I Drool Black And Gold

Developmental updates

2010-03-22T13:08:00.001-07:00

I'm getting ready to write a post about our trip to San Fran, but I'm waiting for the 720 pictures to download (yes, we were only gone for one week). So I thought I'd take a minute to update on the kids' development. This is my way of tracking the things they're doing since I no longer have a baby book for Hudson. So I guess this post is more for me than you :)

HUDSON:
-This kid's memory blows our minds! He knows his ABCs now and loves to sing them over and over and over. He also randomly broke out in a store last week with Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. His version is pretty cute "twinkle, twinkle, star. How wonder what are. Up above sky high. Like diamond in sky." We definitely have to get this on film.

- He likes to tell you everyone's name. If you ask him his name, he says "Name, Hudson James Prichard" and then continues with "Name, Hadley Grace Prichard. Name, Mommy Prichard. Name, Daddy Prichard." He had a hard time saying his nanny's last name (Bissally) so when you ask him Joyce's name he says "Name, Joycey Bussy, ahahahah!" (He covers his mouth and laughs since he knows he's not saying it correctly.). Lately he's been saying "Name, Joycey Bussy. Name, Joycey SALLY!"

-He LOVES jigsaw puzzles and is a master at them.

-He's been into a few dinosaur books. His transportation books are still his favorites and he loves to tell you which is the "single propeller passenger airplane" and which is the "microlite". Some other favorites from those books are the "4 wheel drive", "combine harvester", and "airport fuel tanker".

-Joyce once told him that a tanker truck outside of our house was going to pick up gas, so every tanker, bus, or airplane he sees, he tells you "Tanker truck/bus/airplane pick up gas".

-When he can't get someone's attention, he resorts to calling them by their names. So far, he's called for "Ryan" (and he does that often), "Reuben" (aka Pop Pop), and "Jack" (aka Pappy).

-He continues to be lovey and affectionate - always giving be hugs and kisses :)

HADLEY:
-She is just the happiest baby ever! As soon as she wakes up, she glows with the biggest smiles you can imagine (made all the cuter with her huge chubby cheeks).

-She cuddles next to me all night and with sleep the entire night. We haven't made the transition to the crib yet, but I'm enjoying all of the snuggles!

-She recently started to giggle out loud. Her biggest bout of giggles came while she was looking at Mom Mom when we were riding to our hotel from the airport in San Francisco.

-She has learned how to blow bubbles. This may be a side effect from her new drool machine status. She also sucks on her hands so we may have some impending teeth (though nothing is visible yet).

-She's a girl who knows what she wants! Hudson never turned away a chance to nurse, but if I try to force it on Hadley (like when we're flying and I'm trying to make sure her ears pop), she throws a bit of a fit.

-She gasps for air and acts as though she can't breathe when you wipe her face or put her shirt on. And then come the tears. Like I said, she knows what she does (and doesn't!) want!

Okay, off to go through these pictures. SF post coming shortly.....

Full of gummy smiles!

2010-02-16T09:58:00.000-08:00

Hadley Grace has been full of smiles lately. She seems to have kicked the cold and is back to her happy self. She LOVES to be on her changing table and just cracks up at her name on the wall. Here are some of the pics:

And all of those smiles are because she was looking up at this:

Someone pinch me!!

2010-02-10T08:40:00.000-08:00

I never thought this day would come. Ever. I fully anticipated that I would go off to CMU with Hudson and need to rock my 18-year old son to sleep. But now I have hope. For two straight days he has allowed me to rock him for a few minutes then put him into his crib awake and let me walk out of his room. With no tears (for either of us). For both his nap and at bedtime. It's a sleeping miracle!! It has been really cute. I think he's internalizing his big brother status. I tell him how proud I am of him for going to bed on his own and he tells me "Hudson pillow. Hug Birdie. Hadley Grace cry." which translates to "Hudson lays on his pillow, hugging his Big Bird because Mommy has to leave to get Hadley Grace who is crying".

We're so proud of you Hudson James!

You know you're a mom when....

2010-01-27T13:22:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking about this post for a few days since it seems I have so many "mom tags" these days. And I laugh when I think of how different my life was 2.5 years ago. I'm sure there are many lists like this out there, but these are my mom tags. Please feel free to add yours in the comment section.

You know you're a mom when...

...you could be on the show "What not to wear". Just today I ran errands in the following attire: non-maternity grey sweatpants that were clearly too tight, and therefore also wore some VPLs, Uggs pulled up haphazardly over the sweats, a nursing tank, a hoodie that was too large, a red pea coat, severely overgrown eyebrows, dark circles under my eyes, and greasy hair. I kept looking for Stacey and Clinton to be filming secret footage.

...you have a children's show theme song stuck in your head at any given moment. For me, it's usually "It's signing time with Alex and Leah..."

...you know more about the features of your stroller than you do about the features of your car.

...Friday and Saturday nights are no different than a Tuesday night.

...you're more familiar with the local preschools and story times than you are with the local bars and restaurants.

...you don't think twice about wiping boogers off of your child's face with your bare finger.

...you are personally responsible for keeping the snack food industry in business.

...your car is littered with random toys and snack foods.

...you have NO idea what the hottest songs on the radio are.

...you and your husband have full conversations with spelled-out words. "Hey, I'm going to take a b-a-t-h. Can you watch the kids?" "Sure. Should I give him m-i-l-k or j-u-i-c-e while you're up there?"

...you don't remember the last time you slept without a little foot or hand kicking or hitting you all night long.

...you're a master stain remover.

...you learn that Mr. Clean Magic Erasers do more than just clean your bathroom. They also remove crayon from anything.

...your house looks like FAO Schwartz.

...you know every creak the floor and door of your child's room make and are an expert at avoiding them.

...you don't bat an eye when you find a matchbox car or stray cheerios in your purse.

and lastly...

...you don't care how cliched this phrase is because it captures your feelings perfectly: You truly know your a mom when you see your heart outside of your body.

She's growing

2010-01-14T12:44:00.000-08:00

Much to my dismay, despite my orders for her to stay little, our baby is growing! At a rapid pace!
Here are her numbers:
Birth: 6 lbs, 3 oz
Next day before release (24 hours old): 6 lbs, 2 oz
First doctor's appt at 4 days old: 5 lbs, 15 oz
Second doctors appt at 13 days old: 6 lbs, 11 oz
And her numbers from her one month check-up?

8 lbs, 6 oz!!!!!!!!!!!!!

90 minutes after birth

1 month, 3 days old before the doctor's appt

Hadley's photo shoot

2010-01-11T13:13:00.000-08:00

We had a photo shoot with Meghan Boyer when Hadley was just 11 days old. The pictures are fantastic! Here are some of my favorites:

Here's the link to the entire album.

Our Christmas in review

2010-01-11T12:37:00.000-08:00

I know this is a bit late, but better late than never, right??

We had a WONDERFUL Christmas. We were lucky enough to have both families travel to us. Ryan's parents, my parents, our 3 brothers were all here to celebrate the holiday. On Christmas Eve, we had a nice dinner, complete with a fight over the holiday nut (for those of you not familiar with this tradition, we hide a nut in the dessert (this year we had a banana pudding) and the person to get the nut is supposed to have a year of good luck. Ryan's competitive nature takes over and this becomes a bit of a blood bath. Rules have been created to keep people in check. Much to Ryan's chagrin, I got the nut (again)!) :)

After the nut fiasco, I asked Hudson if he wanted to leave Santa milk and cookies. We went to get milk and Hudson protested. Instead he wanted to leave Santa cookies and coffee creamer. Sorry about that Santa!

Christmas morning was so fun! Our house was an explosion of gifts since everyone was visiting. Hudson took the first gift, opened it slowly, then wanted to play with it right away. It took a good 15 minutes to get through one gift! He slowly got through all of them (and there were a ton!). He really enjoyed playing with everything...especially the tool bench :)

Sadly, we didn't make it to church. I really wanted to take both kids, but it has gotten exponentially harder to do so.

Here are some of my favorite pics from the day.

It's still too early for Hadley - she's yawning. Even all of the gifts couldn't take Hudson away from his sister!

Hudson in his new recliner

Hadley in her Christmas dress

Me and my angels

Still hugging Hadley! I hope this lasts when they are teenagers!

Christmas was so tiring that Hudson fell asleep while brushing his teeth

Time for an update!

2010-01-06T10:56:00.000-08:00

I really should be working on my dissertation right now, but due to a becoming a Mac user and not having my technical adviser (aka Ryan) available, I'm stuck on something right. So I thought I'd take the time to post an update.

Everything is going great! I can NOT believe that Hadley is one month old!! It really makes me so sad. I didn't get this emotional with Hudson as he aged because I always knew that I would some day have another little baby to hold. But now that we have a little boy and a little girl, Hadley could be the last baby of my own that I cradle and comfort. So it breaks my heart to see that her newborn clothing is actually starting to fit and that her preemie clothes are now too small.

Hudson is totally and utterly smitten with Hadley. He hasn't shown any signs of jealousy. He is constantly kissing her, sometimes too much as he routinely wakes her up because he's kissing and hugging her. He always wants to hold her. He pets her and says "soft". When he kisses her, he says "Mmmmm good!". He calls her "Hadley Grace" all of the time which is adorable. He likes to point to certain features on her (like her ears and fingers) and say "teeny". He has been a wonderful big brother.

Hadley is still sleeping her days (and nights!) away. She probably sleeps for 22 hours each day. At night, she has pretty much been sleeping in our bed since the day she came home. The other night we broke new ground and she slept in her cosleeper bassinet from 11p-1a, ate, and then went back to sleep in there until 4a. At 4, I was too tired and just nursed her in bed. During the day, however, she prefers to be held over her swing or bouncer chair. This should make for an interesting task - completing my dissertation with a baby in one arm! Sometimes I can position her in the boppy, all cuddled up, and she'll stay asleep which buys me some time. Otherwise, I can wear her on my chest in the Moby wrap and she's content. See?

In addition to his big brother role, Hudson has lots of other cute things he's doing right now. He's been saying "Waaaas 'at?" (read: What's that?) with the cutest little intonations. He's started to play independently (which has been a life saver). His favorite toys are his trains, puzzles, cars, toolbench, and art easel. He loves the Wiggles and recently revived his interest in Signing Times. His favorite thing to tell you is about everyone that is "gone" (i.e. not home or visiting). Just about every morning he wakes up and says "Grami gone, Pappy gone, Mom Mom gone, Pop Pop gone, Joey gone, Bobby gone, Kevin gone". He literally goes through the entire list. And as soon as Daddy goes to work, he's "gone" too!

As for me, I'm adapting to the new role as a mom of two. Some of the emotions I had before have faded. For example, I was so sad to think about not having individual time with Hudson, but now I see how happy he is with Hadley and don't bat an eye at that. He's also become so attached to Daddy since they have more time together. Hudson hasn't shown interest in nursing (I was afraid he might regress). However, some of the guilt I had before has carried over. I still don't feel as connected with Hadley. I feel like she comes in 2nd alot of times since Hudson might need immediate attention. I don't feel the same anxiety about her every cry as I did with Hudson. I don't have that same heart-wrenching feeling that she needs me all of the time and I would actually be willing to leave her for a little while if I had to (whereas with Hudson, I didn't leave him overnight until he was 22 months old!). Maybe it's just that I have experience now, so I'm not as worried. I don't feel like I engage her as much as I did with Hudson. I was always talking to him, making faces while changing his diaper, etc. With Hadley, I feel like I'm always preoccupied and just happen to have her in my arms. I am constantly thinking that she must sense these things and know how I'm feeling. Then I worry that she'll interpret it as me not loving her as much as her brother. I know that I'm overthinking this, but that's just what I do!

Okay, enough with the sadness! Here are some happy pictures to enjoy :)

Let it snow!!!

2009-12-22T11:48:00.000-08:00

I love the snow. Not necessarily in the "bundle-up-and-play-in-it" way, but the "sit-inside-and drink-cocoa" kind of way. I was so lucky to have that opportunity on Saturday when Blizzard 2009 hit Baltimore. We woke up to a Winter Wonderland! Hudson's first reaction? "Mess. Grami did it." We still don't know why he's blaming the snow on my mom, but he says it every time he looks outside. I had plans to bake cookies on Saturday, so the weather was perfect for that! Here are a few pics:The view in our alleyway

Saturday night clean up crews driving down our street

Hudson, not sure what to think

Catching snowflakes

Post snow runny nose, rosy cheeks and hot cocoa residueHadley stayed all bundled up inside with Mommy

Hudson wanted to go inside, but that didn't stop Daddy from building a snowman alone

Expectations

2009-12-17T12:20:00.000-08:00

We all have expectations about the way certain things will play out, especially significant life events. My expectations for last weekend were that Ryan's parents would get into town on Friday. Ryan and I would go to his work holiday party on Friday night. All day Saturday and Sunday, we would work on getting the house ready for baby. Things on that list included installing a car seat, packing a hospital bag, coming up with a plan in case baby arrives in the middle of the night (i.e. finding a babysitter for Hudson), and coming up with a girl's name we liked just in case. Well, as you already know, nothing went as planned! Here are a few things I wasn't expecting:

-To be angry with my husband as I'm going into labor
-To be driving myself to the hospital
-To not feel excitement from Ryan about the baby's imminent arrival
-To not have a car seat installed
-To not have a hospital bag packed
-To not have a name picked
-To not have a babysitter planned for Hudson
-To not have a last minute to cherish alone time with Hudson
-To not have Hudson visit me in the hospital
-To not go into labor without pitocin
-To not have Ryan present for my epidural
-To not have any tearing after giving birth
-To have a tiny baby
-To have a little girl
And most importantly....

-To none of this mattering.

I got so caught up in all of these details, that I lost sight of the larger picture that the things that matter were all accounted for:
-That my husband was present for the baby's birth
-That our families are willing to drop everything for us when we needed them
-That I was healthy
-That our baby was healthy
-That we have one more child to share our hearts with
And THAT is what's really important.

The story of Hadley Grace

2009-12-15T12:56:00.000-08:00

I've been itching to write this post for days now so that I can be sure to remember all of the details, but the chaos of the holidays and a new baby hasn't left me with much time to do much of anything. So, here it goes...this is everything that I can remember. (Warning: for those of you who know me, I like to tell stories with every detail possible, so you may want to take a minute, grab a drink, and kick your feet up because this is going to be a long one!)

Wednesday night, December 9th, was a nice evening. Joyce, our nanny, was off so I spent the day with Hudson. We went to Hoppin' Tots gym and then hung out at home. Ryan had a work dinner so we knew we wouldn't see him until late. It just so happened that one of my best friends from high school was in town for business, so Hudson and I had arranged to go to dinner with her and a coworker. Hudson was an angel for me all day and evening. He behaved at dinner and when we got home, he took a bath and went to bed with out too much of a fight. I set aside some time to do my Christmas cards after he was asleep. The night was flying by and when I looked at the clock, I realized it was 10:30p and I hadn't heard from Ryan. He had his work dinner at 6p and then was meeting up with a friend for a drink afterwards. I gave him a call, but it went right to voicemail. That's the ultimate fear of any worrywart like me...not being able to get in touch with my husband, especially while 9 months pregnant! So I told myself that I wouldn't panic until 11:30p if I didn't hear from him. Well, you guessed it - 11:30p rolls around and still no phone call. By now, Hudson had already woken up and I brought him to my bed to hopefully alleviate some of my fear. I just laid there and was thinking the worst - that something happened to Ryan. Why else would he not be home yet? Oh yeah, I should mention that he had to get up at 4a for work the next day so I knew that he wouldn't stay out too late. I'm already a worrier by nature, but then add to that the fact that we live in Baltimore where things like this happen (Zach Sowers was definitely on my mind as I was panicking), and I was a mess. I was trying to think about what I was going to do. I considered calling the restaurant where he was having dinner, but I was trying to not overreact. So I decided to send a text message to the wife of the friend he was meeting for drinks. I decided to just ask her if she's heard from her husband since I couldn't get in touch with Ryan. I waited to hear back from her, but I figured she may already be in bed. Next, I decided that I would put Hudson in the car and drive around Fells Point, looking for Ryan's car if I didn't hear from him by 12a. Well, 12a rolls around and I decide to call Ryan one more time.....and he answers! He said he was driving home and that his phone was dead (since he was in his car now he was able to charge it). I told him that I was worried like crazy and what would I have done if I had gone into labor?!?! Little did I know what was coming....

I laid in bed, furious. Ryan got home, brushed his teeth, and got into bed without saying anything and fell asleep. I decided that I should pee (again) before going to sleep even though I felt like I already had a little (lots of leaky fluids these days, so I wasn't surprised). I went to the bathroom and noticed that my underwear were a little wet. I didn't think much of it until after I peed and stood up and left another tiny leak. I walked downstairs to check my "things to watch for" sheet from the doctor and "Leaking fluids - trickles or gushes" was listed. So I decided to call labor and delivery, especially since I had a little leakage of mucus the day before. The doctor asked if I thought my water had broken and I honestly told her that I had no idea. Nothing was gushing (which I expected). She told me that it didn't have to gush, but that it could be a gradual, continual leak. So I told her that I wasn't coming in unless the leakage continued. I walked back upstairs and proceeded to change my underwear 3 or 4 more times before I decided that I was going to the hospital. Still angry, I woke Ryan up and told him that I was going to the hospital. He groggily nodded and went back to sleep. I started to get dressed and he asked what I was doing (talking to someone half asleep after they had been drinking was not something that I wanted to be doing). I told him (again) that I was going to the hospital. He stumbled out of bed to watch me brush my hair and get dressed. He hugged me and told me to call once I knew anything and that he was going to have the phone next to him. So I called my mom and his mom to give them the warning and off I went to Hopkins.

As I drove there, I had some time to myself to think. I was willing myself not to cry. Deep down, I knew 100% that this was it. But I kept forcing myself to say I was just going in to get checked to be safe and that I would be headed home soon. I turned on some Christmas music to take my mind off of these events. "Last Christmas" by Wham was just finishing and the next song was "Christmas Shoes". Obviously I turned off the radio and let my mind race. "Could this really be happening?!?" "I'm not ready!" "Why didn't Ryan seemed concerned - how was he able to just go back to sleep?" "Was I really driving myself to the hospital, alone?" I must have driven around the hospital about 5 times before I decided to park. I told myself that I was just looking for a good and safe parking spot (Hopkins is not in the best part of town and it was 1:30am), but I think I was really trying to compose myself and prepare for what the doctors were about to tell me.

After I gave the receptionist my information, she started to walk me back to my room. There was a family sitting in the waiting room and I could just feel their pitiful eyes on me. "Look at this poor girl, all alone, with just her purse and a beach towel to sit on" they said. I really started to feel sorry for myself. I got checked in and changed and looked at the clock. It was 1:45a. By 2:15a, a doctor came in to do an exam. He was an ER resident (not an OB) so his exam was downright cruel. It hurt so bad that I had a hard time holding myself together. He told me that there were 3 different tests to determine if in fact my water did break. The first two suggested that it did, but they were prone to false positives. The most conclusive was an examination of the fluid under the microscope. He left the room to do that and I asked him to hurry with results in case I needed to call my in-laws to drive down from NJ to be with Hudson so Ryan could make it to the hospital. At that point, despite the results not being known, I knew that I was in labor. I called Ryan to let him know that 1. I got to the hospital safely (seriously, this is not a great part of town) and 2. that I was most likely in labor. Since he was going to sleep with the phone next to him and since I assumed that he was anxiously awaiting to hear from me, I figured that he would answer quickly. Nope. After 28 rings he finally picked up and I exploded in tears. How could he be in such a deep sleep when he knew that I was headed to the hospital?!? I had a brief conversation with him and he was off to call his parents. I was off to cry.

At this point, I was an absolute emotional mess. I tried to hold myself together, but I just couldn't. I started to think about Hudson and how I didn't kiss him goodbye and have one last moment with just the two of us. I was thinking about being alone in the hospital. About the lack of enthusiasm I felt from my husband and how that made me so sad for baby #2. About how I wasn't ready for the baby. My nurse came in and asked if I was okay. I told her I was just really emotional and sad to be alone. She was a doll and stayed with me and talked to me to keep my mind off of things. She got me ready to move my my delivery room (room #8 - the same room I delivered Hudson in!). The doctors agreed to not start pitocin until Ryan arrived. Since I spoke to him around 2:45a, I estimated that his parents would be in town by 6a. So I just chatted with the nurse until he arrived.

When he walked in, I burst into tears once again. I explained everything that I was feeling. In addition to everything I listed, my nurse told me that no one under the age of 16 was allowed to visit due to H1N1 concerns. I didn't think anything of it at first...until I realized that Hudson fell into this category. He wouldn't be able to meet his brother or sister. I wouldn't see him for at least two days. And I didn't even kiss him goodbye! I was a mess. Poor Ryan didn't know what to do or say.

For the next few hours, I was okay if I just didn't let my mind wander too far. I was given my pitocin at 8:45am. Things didn't really progress until about 12p. I started to feel the contractions. Learning from my last delivery, I knew that I shouldn't wait until they were really painful to ask for the epidural (since it takes a while for the doctors to administer it). So I asked for it. They told me that Ryan was going to have to leave the room since they've had many dads passing out during the epidural insertion. I have this weird phobia about my spine being touched, so I really wanted him there, but they wouldn't allow it. I sat up to prepare for the epidural and got really light headed. I began to get muffled hearing, so I knew I was going to pass out. They had me lay down and the anesthesiologist left the room (apparently she was upset that her patient wasn't actually ready). I'm trying to tell myself to hold it together because I needed the pain meds! I told them that I was ready to try again, but they were worried since my blood pressure was so low (88 over 55). The epidural also dilates the blood vessels and thus drops the blood pressure even more. They waited a while (as my pain was getting worse) and finally attempted the epidural again. As they were prepping my back, I got an awful contraction and the blood pressure cuff was tightening around my arm. I was getting light headed again, but willed myself to be strong since I need the meds! Finally the epi was in and Ryan was back in the room!

Because they were worried about the drop in blood pressure, they decided to administer the pain medication very slowly which meant I still had lots of pain, particularly on the lower left side. I was on a temporary drip of medication until they ensured that my blood pressure was safe. Just as this began to wear off, our moms arrived around 3pm. I was resting, unable to really move or talk. Ryan has some great footage of me just bundled up, still and silent. I felt like I could pass out if I moved, so I just stayed in one spot. During this time, Ryan and our moms tried to name our child after a Steeler in honor of that night's game against the Browns (this is on the video).

I finally began to feel better and was able to sit up and start talking around 4pm. The nurses asked if I had pressure and I did, but it was way up high in my ribs. We guessed that baby was kicking his/her way out :) The nurses checked me and the baby's head was at +3. They asked if I wanted to start to push and I said sure. I wasn't feeling pain, so why not? We did 3 counts of 10 breaths and the nurse told me to stop. The baby was coming! They had to call Dr. Wheeler and another doctor in. The docs prepped their table and got their scrubs on. They had me push for another 4 or 5 sets of 10 breaths. At 4:45p, as the baby came out, they held the legs closed and gave Ryan the scissors to cut the cord. Then they handed baby to me so that I could hold him/her up and shout out boy or girl. As the baby is handed to me, I'm fully expecting to see a penis. Instead I see...well...I didn't know what I saw. I couldn't tell if it was a scrotum or a swollen labia! So I hestiated for a second until I realized that there was no penis. A GIRL!!!!!! I couldn't believe it. Everyone was in shock. Our moms burst into tears (there are zero girls in Ryan's family, so this was a big deal). They placed her on my chest and we had the best skin-to-skin bonding. She began to nurse. It was wonderful. The nurses said that they like to give the mom and baby as much skin-to-skin time as possible before taking measurements and doing the bath. So, for an hour, we all sat there amazed that we had our little girl. She looked little and we all made guess as to her weight and length. While she seemed little to me, I was trying to think back to Hudson (who was 7 pounds, 7 ounces) and I thought she was similar, so I guessed 7 pounds, 2 ounces. I was wrong! She was 6 pounds, 3 ounces and 18" long....where did this little peanut come from?!?

As for me, I was feeling GREAT! I only pushed for 11 minutes (although close to 5 of those minutes were spent waiting for the doctors to do their prep). I had no tearing. It was amazing how different that was compared to Hudson's birth. I was able to move around with no problems.

We moved to my recovery room (room 372) and Ryan and I were just head over heels. We were still in so much shock over having a little girl. I know I've stated this before, but I was convinced that I was having a boy because:
-According to the Shettles method, the baby was conceived on an ovulation day that would predict boy
-My pregnancy was very similar to my first
-My belly looked the same as it did with Hudson
-Similar weight gain (50 lbs with Hudson, 54 this time)
-There are no girls in Ryan's family
-Lastly, I convinced myself it was a boy so that I wouldn't get my hopes up of a girl
(Some other random similarities between the pregnancies, unrelated to the sex, were that the weekend before both kids were born is when I decided to bake tons of cookies and that both kids were born right after/during a Steeler/Browns game. Looks like I have some signs to look for in case we have another one!).

While we had a boy's name picked out (Tyson Miller), we only had a list of girl names that we hadn't decided on. The list included:
Harper
Hadley
Harlow
Kensington (Kensi)
London

In early September, we fell in love with the name London and were sure that we would use it if we had a girl. But as I became more convinced of having a boy, we didn't really talk about it much more. Now, it didn't have the same appeal. Hadley just sounded right. As for a middle name, Grace just came out of no where. We never mentioned middle names before we were in the hospital. I was walking out of the bathroom while Ryan was holding the baby and we talked about using Ann (since it's both of our moms' middle name). I kept saying it over and over and it just didn't flow. All of a sudden, I was like, what about Grace? I liked the way it sounded and I also liked that it serves as a reminder of God's grace in our little girl. And so, Hadley Grace was it!

And if that novel wasn't enough, here's a little video that Ryan created of Hadley's entrance into the world. (Despite my appearance on this video, I'm posting for Hadley's sake. The announcement of her being a girl is the best part - I was CLEARLY surprised!)

Here I go

2009-12-04T12:55:00.000-08:00

This post is just going to be a bunch of rambling because, well, I need to get some things off of my chest.

I have been completely MIA from my blog lately and it makes me really sad. I don't know what it is (although I am blaming pregnancy hormones), but I'm just unmotivated and uninspired to do my "Mommy keepsake duties". On Hudson's 2nd birthday, I sat on the couch after he went to bed, with my laptop, fully intending to write a nice post like I did on his first birthday. But the words just wouldn't come to me. I was having a hard time recalling the past year, struggling to write anything backed with emotion. So I gave up and haven't been back since. And now I'm here today to try to ease some of my guilt and hopefully blog forward.

One of my biggest fears in life (right under losing Ryan or Hudson) is regret. Sometimes it actually consumes me. It's what kept me going through all of the journals, keepsakes, pictures, etc of Hudson's life. But once I got pregnant, alot of that began to slip. I haven't been documenting what Hudson has been up to and I'm so afraid of regretting this in the future. I have very few videos of him. I stopped keeping up with his baby book sometime last spring. I can barely keep up with this blog. What's even worse, is that baby #2 has gotten an even worse deal. I don't think I've written in my pregnancy journal for about 3-4 months. Again, it saddens me so much to think about looking back to this time period and not having anything documented - from the superficial stuff like my weight gain (although I'm not sure I want to remember that!) to the emotional aspect of my thoughts and feelings about this pregnancy. Yet it's not enough to kick me in the butt and actually do it. I've found that what used to be enjoyable has now turned into a burden for me. Maybe it's the hormones, maybe it's the lack of sleep, maybe it's the 1000 other things on my daily to do list. Whatever it is, I hope it leaves soon.

Sorry for the long rant. If you got this far, thanks for listening. I've been feeling a bit down about things lately (which is very odd since I have so many blessings in my life and everything is going really well). I'm just starting to panic about having two kids, worrying that Hudson's life is going to change so much. I was feeding him last night and just started to cry thinking about how much I'll miss all of our one-on-one time. Oh great, here come the waterworks again. I keep reminding myself that he's going to love being a big brother and that his life is only going to change for the better, but I just can't help but think there are going to be times that he's going to miss his alone time with Mommy and Daddy.

Okay, I'm a blubbering mess now. Hopefully writing this post is cathartic which was my goal. I thought maybe if I put this all out there, that I could move on and post something fun, like pics of Hudson's birthday or our last trip to Pittsburgh. These feelings have been weighing on me for a while now and I'm having a difficult time trying to process everything. Praying that things start to get better.

Non-stop development!

2009-10-23T13:41:00.000-07:00

I've really been wanting to post about Hudson's development for a while and just haven't found the time thanks to this out of control nesting instinct that has kicked in (just as an aside...where did this come from?!? I've already cleaned and reorganized our closets, built the crib and dresser (well, made Ryan build the crib and dresser...), and rearranged the furniture in our house. The baby isn't even due for 9 more weeks, but I'm OBSESSED with getting this house ready). Anyways, Hudson is blowing us away with his development and his cuteness.

-I've been really wanting to post the video of this, but I can't figure out how to shorten it. Hudson's most exciting accomplishment lately has been spelling his name! For a while, he would see an 'H' and say 'H - Hudson'. On Oct. 2nd, I was sitting on the couch with him and he just looked at me and said "H-u-d-s-o-n". I was in total shock! I made Ryan run in and see if we could have him do it again and did. Then he would do it all the time (in a cheerleader voice H-u-d, S-o-n). Our nanny would tell him to tell another kid his name at the park and he would just spell it. We didn't teach him this, but we just write his name alot when we draw. Apparently he was paying attention!

- He can count to 10 (this isn't new though)

- He knows all of his colors

- He knows most of his letters, but just not in order. If you point to a "Q", he'll say "Q", but he can't say his ABCs yet.

- He knows most of his shapes.

- He LOVES to hug and kiss the cats. Thankfully, they allow this

- "Oh dear" has been replaced with "Oh Gosh!" in his vocabulary. Between this phrase and his hair style, I'm not totally convinced that he isn't 89 years old!

- He walks up and down the stairs. No more scooching down on his bum!

- Sometimes when we wants Ryan's attention, instead of saying "DAD!", he'll say "RYAN!". It cracks me up!

- Since his language is picking up, we need to watch what we say. Ryan and I don't usually ever swear (unless we're watching a Steeler game!), but I do say "Oh crap!". Unfortunately, now Hudson does too.

- He likes this new soap that my mom bought him. He opens it in the tub, sniffs it, and says "Mmmmm...good!" (It's coconut scented). I have a video of this too, but just need to get it uploaded.

- When he farts, he says "toot!". Then we have to remind him to also say "Excuse me".

- He has different voices when he's talking about something big and something little. If it's big, he'll say "BIIIIIIIG truck!" and when it's little he'll whisper in a high pitched voice "little truck".

- When he's really excited over something you're about to give him, he immediately says "thank you!". Most other times you have to remind me to say it.

- Nothing much new with sleeping or eating. He still wakes up about 2 times a night. And he still eats nothing much more than crackers and yogurt.

- Some of his favorite toys are: legos (yes, the real little kind that our nanny accidentally bought him while he was sick. Some of the pieces are the size of a tic tac!), balloons and balls (to kick), crayons/things to draw with.

- Some of his favorite books are: Bounce One Baby (which he calls "Baby Jump"), Bathe One Baby, any Spot book, Peekaboo Blueberry, I love you through and through, Goodnight Moon (where he loves to point out the "firetruck", aka fire place).

I'm sure there's so much more that he's doing, but it's slipping my mind as I think about cleaning our garage....

H1N1 made its way to our house

2009-10-15T14:04:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I actually had to type that. Hudson, who has yet to really have any type of illness, was diagnosed with H1N1 yesterday. I've gotten lots of emails and facebook messages from people asking about how I knew he had it, how he's being treated, etc., so I thought I would share all of my newly learned H1N1 knowledge to educate all of the other moms out there worried about this virus. (Warning: this is going to be pretty long).

So, I guess it really all started Saturday morning. We were in Pittsburgh visiting my family. My little brother Joey, who is 14, was saying that he wasn't feeling well. He really napped all day and ended up having a fever. We actually didn't see him for much of the weekend after Saturday morning since he was laid up in bed. The entire house (my mom, stepdad, other brother, myself, and Ryan) were extremely vigilant about germ control. Anything that Joey touched (blankets, pillows, etc) went straight to the wash. We had bottles of Purrell all over the house. In addition to Hudson, my 10 month old niece was also there, so we were trying to protect them.

On Monday, Hudson had some diaherra before we left Pittsburgh. We leave at his nap time and he usually sleeps for the entire trip. But this time, he woke up at Breezewood (almost the half way point) and was saying "belly hurt". When we got home, he seemed fine. On Tuesday, he was fine other than his lack of appetite. He also had a mild cough. At midnight, he woke up and Ryan went to lay him back down (this is an everynight occurance...he never sleeps all night). Ryan brought him into our room and asked me to feel if I thought he felt warm. He was definitely running a fever. I didn't want to take his diaper off, so I just checked his temperature under his arm. It was 100.7. He was coughing more and more and it was really raspy. I started to get freaked out (remember, he's never been sick), so I called the on call pediatrician. She was clearly unhappy about my anxiety. I explained that I was worried since we have two high risk people in the house (Hudson, for being under 2, and me, for being pregnant). She said that 100.7 is barely a fever and if he's breathing okay, there's nothing to worry about (easier said than done!). The rest of the night was spent trying to comfort him and worrying.

On Wednesday morning, he was burning up and I took his temperature rectally. It was 103. He was really lethargic. I called the pediatrician again and spoke with the nurse practitioner. She told me that this is just something going around and to make sure that he doesn't have 1. rapid breathing 2. lack of thirst or 3. a temperature above 104. I mentioned again that I was pregnant and asked if I should take precautions. She recommended calling my OB since many pregnant women were being treated with Tamiflu.

So I called my OB who was APPALLED that the pedi didn't test Hudson for H1N1. She said that it was important to know for my well-being as well as his. She was calling me a prescription for Tamiflu in and told me that if I started to feel sick at all to start taking it. I told her I would call the pediatrician back and ask them to test him. We were able to get an appointment for that afternoon.

Before leaving for his appointment, he was burning up and was due for another dose of motrin (which had been helping tremendously). But I decided to let the doctor see him and then I would give him the motrin. When we got there, his temperature was 104.4. The doctor checked his lungs, ears, and nose and said everything else looked okay. She explained that she was going to give him the rapid flu test which only tests whether or not he has influenza and does not differentiate between the different types (i.e. it wouldn't tell us if he had H1N1 or another kind). That said, she explained that any positive rapid test is assumed to be positive for H1N1 since it's too early in the season for the other flus to be presenting themselves. The test for H1N1 takes 4 days to provide results at which point it would be too late for either of us to begin Tamiflu. She then did the rapid test which is a swab WAY up into Hudson's nose. Within 5 minutes she came back and said it was positive. She was going to write Hudson a prescription for Tamiflu, but explained that it could be hard to find at a pharmacy since Hudson would need a liquid form which was a bit rare.

After calling around to a few places, we were able to find it at Hopkins. They closed in an hour, so I rushed out to get it for him. Well, I get to the pharmacy and realized that I forgot the prescription at home. So I called the on duty pediatrician and explained the situation and asked her to call the prescription in while I waited. She asked if Hudson had asthma and I told her no. She asked why his doctor prescribed Tamiflu then. She said Tamiflu was reserved for patients with compromised immune systems and that they weren't just giving it to any child who had flu symptoms. I told her I was pregnant and she said that was why it was prescribed. I couldn't believe that Hudson would be left to suffer had I not been pregnant!

I called my OB back and told her that Hudson's test was positive and she said that it was best for me to start Tamifu right away. So, I got the Tamiflu for both Hudson and myself. Since Hudson has the flu, he will take it twice a day for 5 days. Since I've only been exposed, I will take it once a day for 10 days. It was pretty amazing to see how all of the doctors were really more concerned with me than with Hudson (and I wasn't even sick!). Of course, it made me nervous, but also relieved. I would rather it be me who was at risk than Hudson.

Last night was another rough night. Hudson still had a fever and was really congested with a nasty cough. He's been sleeping all night in our arms since he needs to be upright or else he gets too congested. Of course, I'm exhausted now which isn't helping the whole prevention of me getting sick. I've been coughing more and more and feel like I have chest/back pains. I go to the OB tomorrow, so I'll be checked then.

I just wanted to put the whole story out there so that other people can understand what symptoms to look for and why their doctor may not test/treat the flu. We're all praying that this passes soon.

My apologies....

2009-10-03T18:27:00.001-07:00

....for not letting you know that we all survived the weekend apart!

Friday morning, Ryan and I were doing some last minute packing, relaxing, and enjoying a Starbucks. We were planning on leaving as soon as we got everything together. We were ready around 11:30am. I was so excited about the trip that I wasn't even dreading saying goodbye to Hudson. When the time came to leave, he told us "buh bye" and waved, gave hugs and kisses, and we left. There were no tears (from me or Hudson!).

Ryan and I had a fantastic time in Cape May. We spent LOTS of time by the pool, reading. The beach was a little too windy. Plus the hotel had an "adult pool" which was basically a large bath tub - the water was SO warm. In addition to relaxing, we ate....TONS. On Friday night we hit up Martini Beach for dinner. On Saturday, we went to Mad Batter and 410 Bank St. On Sunday, we went to George's and The Ebbitt Room (where we also celebrated our engagement 5 years ago). We did a little shopping and some walking on the beach. We watched our beloved Steelers hand a game over to the Bungles, which was all the less exciting given that we were watching the game with a deaf Bungles fan who kept shouting things at us even though we couldn't understand him. We were lucky to be joined by another Steelers couple....who happened to be Carnegie Tech grads! Small world!

On Saturday afternoon, I asked Ryan "is it bad that I'm not missing Hudson?". I mean, being able to dictate your own wake up time (which, unfortunately, was still 5 or 6a), eat a warm meal in a restaurant, have adult conversation, and relax is pretty easy to get used to! By Sunday night though, we were at dinner talking about how we missed Hudson and I finally broke down and started to cry. I was quite proud of myself for making it that long!

Hudson, on the other hand, didn't seem to realize we were gone! Mom Mom and Pop Pop kept him busy. Much to my relief, he didn't even ask for us until Sunday. One of the best parts about leaving him was that the return trip was so much more exciting. Usually, you're bummed when you leave vacation. But this time, I was so excited to come home and see him. Hudson, however, did not feel the same way. He was napping when we got home. I ran to the store and he woke up while I was gone. Ryan was holding him and when I came up to say hello, he started to scream and cry. I couldn't even look at him without him shouting "No!". Apparently, our cats taught him their lesson of being mad at Mommy and Daddy when we leave. It wasn't until Monday night that Hudson allowed me to hold him. Of course, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm, but it was better than him crying for us while we were gone.

Here are a few pics from the trip:The Congress Hall Hotel

The view from the pool

Me and my belly on the beach

Posing at the spot where Ryan proposed 5 years ago

The baby and the lighthouse

Mixed emotions

2009-09-25T05:20:00.000-07:00

Well, the weekend is finally here. My wonderful husband surprised me with a weekend trip to Cape May as a birthday gift. Cape May holds a special place in our hearts because that's where Ryan proposed and we had a big celebration with both of our families. So there's a lot of emotion attached to the destination, making it the perfect place for us to go away together. I'm obviously thrilled to go back, have some one-on-one time to connect with my husband, and do what all moms dream about....relax.

However, this is our first overnight trip without Hudson. It's been 682 days since that little monkey arrived in our lives and, every one of those nights, I have spent with him. Ryan has gone away for various trips since Hudson's birth, but I have never once left him over night. This is probably the point in the post that most readers are thinking "wow, lady, it's time to cut the cord". The truth is that I was nursing for so long (19 months) that the thought of leaving him overnight and needing to pump sounded less than appealing. In addition, I refused to subject anyone else to Hudson's middle of the night antics, which include crying and needing to be held, often once an hour. But we have gotten to a point where Hudson is sleeping better (not all night, but not waking every hour either). And I have gotten to a point, as a mother, where I feel like I'm ready to take that step. So I have overcome my previous fears (of pumping and of Hudson not sleeping), but there's one fear that's still lingering...the thought of Hudson missing us.

I know I'm overthinking this. In fact, when Ryan and I talk about this weekend, he's not afraid of how Hudson will do, but rather afraid of how much he's going to miss Hudson. Sure, I'll miss him too, but I know that I need a break and am looking forward to things like nice dinners with adult conversation and quiet time to read on the beach without disruptions. At the same time, it breaks my heart to think of Hudson asking for me or Ryan and wondering where his Mommy and Daddy are. Even more heart wrenching is the thought of him wondering if we're coming back.

Hudson will be in great hands this weekend. I know that he's going to love spending time with his Mom Mom and Pop Pop. I know that he's going to be adored, loved, and, most likely, spoiled. That has made this weekend much more palatable. In fact, I hope that we come home and Hudson had so much fun that he didn't miss us at all. I know that would crush most parents, but it would provide me with so much relief to know that we were actually forgotten about for 3 days.

While I'm feeling a little sad and nervous about Hudson's reaction over this trip, I'm also excited and giddy about having but a snapshot of my previous life back. While I would never trade my title of "Mommy" in for anything, it's going to be wonderful to remember what it was like when that wasn't my only identity.

Hudson updates

2009-09-16T07:51:00.000-07:00

Since my little guy turned 22 months (sniff!) I thought I'd post some updates on what he's getting into these days....

He LOVES to kick. He will just kick a ball for hours. (During which time he'll also usually "Run. Fast!"). He loves to kick it really hard and say "BIIIIIIIG KICK!", while sticking his tongue out:
He's grown found of Sesame Street. He'll just sit on the couch and watch an entire episode:
One of his favorite things to do on the deck is to use chalk. Sometimes, he gets carried away:He has learned to completely milk every boo boo. In his best old lady voice, he'll say "Oooooooooooh........boo boo.......kiss". Sometimes he also says "Fall. Sorry." (He knows that he's supposed to say sorry if he hurts someone, so he says sorry every time he hurts himself too - it's so freakin' cute!). Here's him complaining about a boo boo:

While I don't have a picture, I think this is still deserving of some blog time - Hudson used the potty yesterday! I was changing him and he started to pee a little. I asked him if he wanted to go on the potty and he said "potty". So I took him in the bathroom and sat him down on the big potty and he went! We did alot of cheering and dancing, so I think he was pretty excited too. He went again before bed.

He's OBSESSED with sharing. While that sounds like a good thing, his idea of sharing isn't what you may have had in mind. He'll say "share" and try to give the other kid what ever he has just so that he can get what the kid has. In other words, he means "share...with me!". In addition, he says "share" over and over and over again....

He is becoming a Mama's boy. He constantly says "Mama hold" and wants me to pick him up and cuddle. He's always kissing me and hugging me. His favorite is a "BIIIIIG HUG" (as he calls it), when he comes running at me with open arms.

As for his sleep, well, let's just say that it's old news. Still takes forever to get him down at night and still wakes up throughout the night. We've gotten into the habit of bringing him into our bed since we're just so tired, but that has to stop before baby #2 comes! We used to be able to hold his hand until he fell asleep, but now he stands up and asks "Momma, hold baby" and he wants me to hold him like a baby and rock him. How could I deny that?!?!

The things no one tells you

2009-09-08T16:39:00.000-07:00

After Hudson arrived, I realized that there were so many things that no one tells you about motherhood. Many of these things are just errors of omission, like how you can NEVER throw bibs (with velcro) in with your other laundry unless you want to snag every last article of clothing in the washer. Others are just indescribable, left to be experienced first hand by each mother, like the amount of love and protection you have for your child. Late one night while we were in NJ, Hudson was having another sleepless night (big surprise) and as I was walking him around the bedroom to lull him back to sleep, I began to revisit these thoughts. But this time, I was thinking about the things that no one tells you about your second pregnancy.

I LOVED being pregnant with Hudson. Sure, I wasn't so fond of the heartburn, but otherwise, it was pure bliss. I adored my big belly. I welcomed 50 pounds onto my body with open arms (when my prior attitude was to groan at gaining 2 pounds). I cherished every little kick and movement that I felt from within. I could sit there for hours just watching my stomach wave and roll, amazed by the life that was growing inside of me. I dutifully recorded every stage of pregnancy through weekly belly pictures and multiple letters to Hudson in a journal. So, it's easy to imagine how excited I was about being pregnant again. Once Hudson turned 1, we decided that it was time to start trying for baby #2 and I was giddy with anticipation of another pregnancy. The problem is that no one told me how different it was going be. So for all of you mommies thinking about #2, let me fill you in on some of the changes....

1. This has been the hardest of all of the differences between pregnancy to deal with....I'm not as connected to this baby as I was to Hudson. When people ask if the baby is kicking alot, I just kinda shrug and say "yeah, I feel him* now and then". With Hudson, I could tell you how many kicks I felt in any given timeframe. When people ask how far along I am, I have to think and even then I'm still not sure that I know. With Hudson, I was constantly reminded of how many weeks I was since I was always getting weekly emails and reading books about each week of my pregnancy. My pregnancy with Hudson seemed to drag on, which left me ample time to bond with my growing baby. This pregnancy is going so quickly that I barely have had a minute to think about it. I feel like my relationship with baby #2 is already less formed than it was with Hudson.

2. Remember that maternal guilt I discussed in this post? Well, it has begun in utero this time around. I'm constantly feeling down on my self for all of my "shortcomings" with this pregnancy. I put shortcomings in quotes because these things would only be considered so by a perfectionist. I haven't really kept a baby book. I have barely taken any belly pictures. I don't read to this baby. I rarely use Thumper (which is this gimmicky baby learning system that I attached to my stomach for two hours each day and it plays thumping noises. With Hudson, I religiously attached that machine to my big belly each morning and each night. In fact, we went to a Steelers game in DC while I was pregnant with Hudson and I even brought Thumper with me so that I could wear it during the hour ride home). I focus so much of my time on Hudson that my bonding time with this baby is getting the short end of the stick. As I mentioned in point #1, I don't really feel bonded to this baby. Talk about feeling guilty!

3. I'm so lax about everything. Not just the baby book, belly pictures, and Thumper, but also with my health. During my pregnancy with Hudson, I worked out up until the day I delivered (literally, I had my workout clothes with me to go to the gym and I ended up going to labor and delivery instead!). I knew the ins and outs of every thing I was or wasn't supposed to eat. This pregnancy I can't even remember what those things are! Despite my fears of nitrates in lunch meats with pregnancy #1, I've found myself eating large quantities of turkey breast and salami (in fact, that was all I could tolerate during my first trimester) this time around. I have had multiple sips of wine and/or alcohol. I don't even ask if cheeses are pasteurized or if the caesar dressing is made with raw eggs this pregnancy. I don't read books to this baby (I mean, he hears me when I read to Hudson, right?). Ryan has also fallen victim to this lackadaisical parent syndrome. I don't think he's actually spoken to this baby, let alone read him stories and tell him how much he loves him

To ease my fears about how much of a disadvantage this baby is at compared to Hudson, I tried to create a list of advantages for this baby as I wondered around the dark room waiting for Hudson to fall back to sleep.

1. This baby will have "experienced" parents. I kept going back and forth about whether this was actually good or bad. I mean, on one hand Ryan and I should know what we're doing by now and learned from any mistakes we made with Hudson. But on the other hand, some of those "mistakes" may have actually been beneficial for Hudson. Like how we never let him cry himself to sleep. We see it as a mistake now since Hudson requires us to sit there with him each night and possibly hold him. But maybe this was a bonding experience that we could possibly neglect baby #2 of. The jury is still out on whether this is advantageous, but I keep telling myself that we have had to learn something in these past 2 years that will help baby #2! The one thing that I keep coming back to is breastfeeding. After 19 months, I should be a seasoned pro and a great teacher for my new little one.

2. The aforementioned tasks of recording everything in a journal, taking belly pictures, etc. has to come at cost....stress. This baby will not be exposed to the anxiety over whether or not that feta I just ate was pasteurized.

3. Probably the most important thing is that that this baby has another person who is going to love him like no one else can....his big brother.

*Since I think this baby is a boy, I'm going to use the masculine pronoun thoughout this post. But believe me, I don't know anything about this baby's gender!

30 just keeps getting better!

2009-09-08T15:59:00.000-07:00

Thanks to my wonderful husband. He planned yet another surprise for me this past week. We went to NJ to visit his family for the week and my family was set to come out from Pgh. My in-laws have a great house near the shore. In addition to being so close to the beach, they have a pool, hot tub, and volleyball court all in their backyard, so we planned for this to be our summer vacation. Ryan and I were so excited to get both of our families together for the week (that's always a good time...especially when martinis are involved....). Plus we were going to have multiple sets of babysitters just itching for alone time with Hudson. We got there on Friday afternoon and my family was set to arrive on Saturday afternoon. On Saturday morning, Ryan asked if I wanted to go see a movie, so Ryan, Kevin (my brother-in-law) and I went to see Inglourious Basterds (which was great, by the way. Oh yeah, and that's not my spelling error...that's actually the title). I knew that my mom, step-dad, and aunt would be at the house when we got back. When I walked in, I was a little surprised by the decorations and the fact that they were all wearing leis. I thought it was weird that my father-in-law was taking pictures of me. Well, out of nowhere jumped my brother, his little girl, my uncle, his girlfriend, (all from Pgh) my best friend from high school, her husband, her daughter, and my best friend from college (all in from NYC)!!! My thoughtful hubby planned a surprise party for me! Later that evening, our good friends from Virginia also arrived. They drove up from VA just for the party and headed back that evening. Talk about awesome friends! (Oh and they did those 10 hours of driving with a 2 year old and a 2 week old!).

This party was yet another reminder of all of the blessings in my life. Having people go out of their way for me (by party planning and/or traveling) touched me so deeply. So, to everyone involved, especially my loving husband, thanks for making this birthday one of the best!

Here are a few pics from the party:

As we're packing the car, I walk downstairs to find Hudson like this...lying in his folded stroller.

My yummy cake that traveled from Pittsburgh - it's not a birthday without Giant Eagle cake!

Walking in and asking why they all had on leis

SURPRISE! Note the hand on my head

Getting filled in on all of the lies

Posing with my yummy cake (complete with Steeler helmets)

Hudson being a mack and being fed strawberries by Layla

30 isn't so bad....if you have a wonderful husband...

2009-08-25T18:31:00.001-07:00

After all of the worrying and the tears, this is what I woke up to today:Well, that and an adorable toddler insanely happy over the abundance of balloons, a loving husband, and a dozen of red roses. The day only got better as I had a spa date with a massage, manicure, and pedicure, followed by a (child-less) dinner out at Ruth's Chris. My husband took care of the details (making reservations, arranging for a sitter, etc). As if that wasn't enough, he gave me a card in the car and explained that my gift was a weekend away at the Congress Hall Hotel in Cape May, NJ with an oceanview room at the end of September. Later at dinner, I told him that he really shouldn't have and he went into an explanation for his motives, expressing how grateful he was for all that I do for him and for Hudson and for all of my patience with his long work hours. I just stared at him in amazement. Is he for real??? And is he really mine???? How did I get so lucky?

I've been meaning to write a post for days now to sing Ryan's praises and I think now is an opportune moment. What he did for me today was something that I'm so grateful for. Had he stopped with the balloons and roses, I would have been head over heels (he knows that I love balloons and flowers, yet he never gets them for me, so it was the thought behind the gesture that left me speechless). But Ryan's actions today are but a small glimpse into the wonderful soul that he is.

The real reason that I wanted to write a post for him was more about the way he treats Hudson. He is a better father than I could have imagined. He never bats an eye at parenting responsibilities. He never shies away from the challenges. He has more patience than I thought one person could possess. But above all of that, he wants to do these things. He gets home from work and rushes to be Hudson's play mate. If Hudson wants to go to the park (which is a given), he takes him. Not only will he take him, he will tell me how much it melts his heart to have Hudson lead him to the door and hand him his shoes. The love that pours out of his voice is something that can't be put into words. He successfully balances the demands of his career with making sure that his priority is his family. He apologizes when he can't help around the house and makes every effort to split our chores. He recognizes the importance of discussing key aspects to our parenting and to our relationship, such as how to approach religion with Hudson. In fact, his generous gift of a weekend away speaks to his attention to the needs of our relationship as husband and wife. He realized that we were getting burned out and needed some time to focus on us. In short, he's unlike any man that I have ever met. And I count my blessings that he's mine.
While my birthday was so special and everything that Ryan did for me exceeded any expectation that I had, I really want to thank him, not for today, but for every other day, when his partnership is in response to the daily routine rather than for a special occasion. Knowing that he is by my side, through thick and thin, in poopy diapers and vomit-soaked clothing, makes this new decade seem much more bearable. I love you Ry!

Getting older...

2009-08-21T13:53:00.001-07:00

...and unfortunately, I'm talking about myself this time and not Hudson.

So, I turn 30 on Tuesday. The big 3-0. In just 4 more short days. I didn't really expect it to affect me as much as it is. I'm fully anticipating a Rachel Green birthday in the Friends episode titled "The one where they all turn thirty". Well, not so much the whole "being upset because I'm not married and I'm dating Tag who isn't cute at all", but more so the tears and the reassurance from friends.

I think most people are shocked when I tell them how much this is bothering me, but let me explain.....

See, after becoming a mom, I feel like I've lost myself. Or more adequately stated, I've become someone else. I used to be the girl who loved to get all dolled up in the newest and trendiest clothes and make-up, go out with friends, get drinks, and have a good time. It was a nice and selfish period. I did everything for myself and/or Ryan. Ever since Hudson arrived, that girl has disappeared and I miss her. Tremendously. This new girl is lucky if her hair is cut and her legs are shaved, let alone worried about if her clothes are in style. Heck, this new girl doesn't even know what types of clothes are in style. I feel like turning 30 will solidify that the old girl is gone forever.

The second reason I don't want to welcome this new decade is because, well, I LOVED my twenties. They were good to me. I was in college, having the time of my life. I turned 21. I moved across the country. I had my first real job. I bought my first car. I started grad school. I got engaged to my soulmate. I got married and had the wedding of my dreams. I traveled through Europe. I got pregnant. I had my first child. For most of my 20s, I was that old girl that I'm missing so much right now. I did what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it. I celebrated so many firsts and milestones. I'm not ready to close that chapter of my life.

Turning 30 feels like the turning point of no longer being young and carefree, but rather being grown and responsible. Gone are the days of splurging on $200 jeans and staying out until 4am and here (to stay) are the days of paying mortgages and college funds. I'm having a hard time realizing the fun that is to come in this decade.

I admit, I feel silly even writing this stuff. I have a wonderful husband, a healthy son (and another on the way...well, maybe a daughter, but I think son), a loving family, amazing friends, and a beautiful home. I recognize all that I've been blessed with and don't mean to discount that at all. Maybe it's just the surge of pregnancy hormones or the fact that I have not slept for 8 straight hours in over two years (by the way, that's no exaggeration. There has not been one night that I've had uninterrupted sleep for 2+ years). Or maybe there is some justification in my feelings. Whatever it is, I hope that it takes it easy on me on Tuesday....

If you're 30, please leave me some comments about how great the decade is. I'm looking for some inspiration and hope.

Video to come,,,

2009-08-13T18:10:00.002-07:00

I know I posted a teaser of an adorable video, but I can't get it to upload. I have to wait until my technical advisor (aka my husband) gets back from his business trip in California to assist. Check back soon....

Too cute to not post!

2009-08-03T09:14:00.000-07:00

I've really been wanting to have a long post with pictures of the last couple of months. We've had some great things to blog about (our trip to Maine, our friends coming to visit, all of Hudson's new words, etc), but I just haven't found the time to upload pictures. But, I HAD to post about his newest phrase because it's beyond cute. I'm warning you....you might pass out from cuteness overload!

On Sunday, Ryan and I hung out around the house with Hudson all day. It was raining in the morning, so it was a great lazy Sunday (after we went to get these donuts in our pajamas). Hudson was just playing around the house and anytime he would drop something or bump something he would say "Oh Dear!". Ryan and I were hysterical! In fact, I can't stop from laughing as I type this. Neither of us use this phrase, so we can only assume that he picked it up from Joyce (our nanny).

While I'm typing, I'll just add a few more cute things he did yesterday. For about the last week, he has started to say "pee-pee" and "poop" while pointing to his diaper. Most of the time, we noticed he was saying it after he did the deed, but we were happy to see him putting words with the action. We weren't planning on potty-training until after the baby is born, but he is starting to show signs of readiness, so we bought a potty yesterday. Sometimes he says "poop" and then farts, so I think he's getting there!

Lastly, I have this obsession with Fall right now. I just love the comfort of warm sweaters in the crisp Fall air, anything and everything pumpkin, yummy flavored lattes, and, of course, Steeler football!! The rainy weather yesterday had me particularly wishful that it were Fall, so as soon as we got back from getting donuts, I put on the NFL network. All day, we watched NFL highlights from last year (including the AFC championship game twice, the NFC championship game, and Superbowl XLIII). Hudson was so into it! He just sat on my lap and watched as we schooled him in Steeler football. He explained to him who Ben was and who the "bad guys" were (i.e. The Ravens). He kept saying "Kick!", but we tried to explain that punting wasn't good while we were on offense. He loves to cheer, although we have to make sure he doesn't cheer when the other team scores. He learned to shout "Dee-fense!" and most importantly, "HEEEEAAAAATTTTHHHH!".

Parenting Priorities

2009-08-01T16:06:00.000-07:00

I love Hudson, I really do. I do everything I can to give him what he needs and be there for him.

BUT... sometimes I like to indulge in a little video game playing on my iPhone. Apparently, Hudson's not too keen on my self-indulgance. As you can see in this picture (which was taken about 2 minutes after I started playing), he's doing everything he can to get my attention. I guess I need to re-evaluate my priorities as a parent. At least according to Hudson!

A quick update

2009-07-16T17:59:00.000-07:00

I know, I know... I'm a slacker blogger. At first I had a good excuse (working on my dissertation), but now my reasons for not blogging are not quite as convincing (watching SYTYCD, reading the Twilight series of book at any free moment, sleeping, etc.). Anyways, since Hudson is upstairs screaming his lungs out with Ryan, I thought I would try to do a quick update. (BTW - the screaming is due to our second round of sleep training. You may have followed our experience with the first round. We made progress, but then plateaued, and ultimately, regressed back to our starting point. This time around Hudson is on to us and REFUSES to go to sleep without us and continues to wake all through the night.)

So, before I get into the update, I just wanted to give another excuse (I know, I'm full of them!) for my lack of blogging. I guess I don't fully understand what the best blogging etiquette is. I know that I enjoy reading blogs when the updates include pictures, but uploading and adding pictures is the time consuming part that I dread. So I end up putting off posts (like Hudson's first airplane trip that was almost a month ago!). If blogging without pictures is appropriate, I'm sure I would do it more often. That said, I have absolutely no idea who reads this blog. My guess is that it is mainly just Hudson's grandparents, a few girls from the Nest with toddlers, and a few friends from high school and/or college. And since our parents and most of my friends receive monthly pictures (which I'm also slacking on...I promise that I'll be better once Edward and Bella are out of my life!), maybe pictures aren't necessary?

Anyways, I wanted to give a quick update about our crazy little monkey. Everyday I am just shocked by the things that he is doing. He pretty much will repeat any word you say to him and most of them sound like they should. I would try to post some the words that he actually knows, but there are just way too many now. There must be at least 100! It seemed to happen overnight! Some of my favorites are "sit" and "ice" which sound JUST like "shit" and "ass". He's obsessed with the color purple - you can point to any color and he'll say it's purple. But yet when he is pointing things out in his books, he'll point to something that's actually purple and say it correctly. So I think he knows his colors, but is just playing with us. Similarly, he's obsessed with the number 8...he treats it the same as purple. But yet if you count and pause between numbers he can sometimes fill in with the correct number. He knows a bunch of animal noises (our favorite is cat because he says "meeee" in a really high pitched voice), but over the last few days everything says "MOOOOOO!" because he knows you'll tickle him and say "nooooo!" He's started saying and signing "please" and "thank you" a bunch. He usually says it when prompting like "How do you ask?" or "What do you say now?", but just today he started to say thank you without a prompt. And, my favorite current trick, if you ask him where the baby is, he picks up my shirt and knocks on my stomach and says "Knock, knock baby".

And here's a runway pose in case posting pictures is a must.....

Mommy accomplishments

2009-07-13T17:23:00.000-07:00

The 13th of each month leaves me a little weepy. It marks another month since Hudson's birth, leaving him less of an infant and more of a toddler than he was the day before. I don't know what it was about him turning 20 months (maybe it's that he's no longer in the "teens"?) that left me especially sentimental today. I don't think the pregnancy hormones are helping much either.

Regardless, I was walking Hudson to the park this evening after work (I don't really have a choice in this activity - as soon as our nanny leaves, Hudson is putting his shoes on, pointing downstairs, and saying "Park"). As I pushed the stroller, I looked down to see the little guy who's going to be a big brother in 5 short months. I can't really travel down that road right now because the thought of him with the baby just chokes me up with a joy that I can't begin to describe. I digress. I looked at this little boy, no longer a baby, and relived the past 20 months. Goosebumps covered my body as they are now. I thought of the excitement of delivering him, the pain and pleasure of breastfeeding, and of all his "firsts" which I recorded dutifully. The changes in Hudson are obvious. But then I began to consider the changes in me, those things that are not necessarily noticeable to the naked eye. And it struck me. No where (that I know of ) do we celebrate the "firsts" of Mommies.

In particular, the "first" that I was thinking of was the first time that a mother recognizes that the "expert advice" is not what she needs to follow as a parent. In other words, the first time a Mommy realizes that she IS the expert for her child. This was a first that took me a long time to reach. I was focused on "doing the right thing" and fearing regret that I often forgot to consult my most informative document of all - Mommy intuition.

On a similar note, I started to think of the first time a Mommy learns to not let the guilt consume her. "Do I go to work and leave my child with a caregiver, breaking my attachment and trust with my child?" "Do I stay at home and run the risk of socially isolating my child from other children, sentencing him to a lifetime of solitude?" These are only two examples of the infinite sources of guilt of Mommies. This is a milestone that I still struggle with and I'm not sure I can honestly say I've accomplished a "first" in learning to let the guilt go.

Mommies also deserve recognition for the first time they realize that their relationship with their husband and their relationship with themselves requires the same nurturing and attention that is provided to their child. This first is one that I feel I JUST achieved. I am ready to take the plunge and leave Hudson overnight with someone. For the past 20 months, I have been with him every single night. No business trips, no girls' weekends, no romantic escapes. I am finally feeling comfortable enough to leave him and I'm proud to have finally gotten here.

I could go on and on about all of the wonderful things that Mommies do. With each of these "accomplishments", something inside of the mother changes. This psychological/spiritual/etc growth serves to better her as a mother and as a person. Before being a mother, I was naive to these changes. Twenty months later, I am overwhelmed by their impact.

Did I mention???

2009-06-25T06:38:00.000-07:00

...that I'm pregnant???
Well, if you haven't already heard via ecstatic phone calls, facebook status, or the Nest, here's the proof!

Hopefully, Hudson comes around on how he feels about this baby. I'm thinking that he was just very upset to have to hold a stick I peed on! :)

All good things come to an end.

2009-06-16T11:50:00.001-07:00

Hudson and I have officially ended our nursing relationship as of June 9th. We had a good run filled with lots of cuddling and bonding time. I never anticipated nursing for 4 days shy of 19 months, but I wouldn't change a thing.

Looking back, it's interesting to think of the path I took to nurse. I was formula-fed as were my brothers. I was 15 when my mom had my younger brother, so I was old enough to remember the bottles and the formula. Naturally, I thought I would formula-feed my children too. But, the minute that second line appeared on the pregnancy test, the analyst in me began researching every little thing that I could. Breastfeeding happened to be one of them. Everything I read praised the benefits of breastfeeding: "Breastfed babies have higher IQs...", "Breastfed babies have fewer behavior problems...", "Breastfeeding is cheaper than formula-feeding..." The list went on and on. I was pretty apprehensive about the whole thing since, well, I'm pretty sensitive in that area and wasn't sure I was going to enjoy having a baby latched on. Won't it tickle? Won't it hurt? Can I be sure that I can watch my diet close enough to ensure good milk? My worries are too endless to list. In fact, if you went through my pregnancy with me, I'm sure you've heard about my nightmares related to breastfeeding (including my baby being born with teeth, me trying to nurse a kitten, etc).

Despite my concerns, I knew that I was still going to try to nurse. It felt too selfish of me to not. The only reasons that I could find against breastfeeding were ones that benefited me. "Breastfed babies don't sleep as long at night...", "Formula-feeding allows you to share responsibility with your husband...", "Breastfeeding is demanding on a mother..". As some of you know, I find it a challenge when people question my strength and determination to do something (why else would I have run a marathon or worked towards a PhD?!?). In fact, it has earned me the nickname "Heath" (after my boy Heath Miller). My point is that I accepted the challenges that breastfeeding would present. Why? Because it was best for my son. Little did I know, it was best for me too.

Our nursing relationship had a bit of a rocky start. Hudson was a bit jaudiced in the hospital. He had lost weight, but we were approved to leave 2 days later. As for me, my breasts were sore, tender, and bloody, as if I was marking myself with my first badge of honor as a mother. Our first few days home, I would cringe and my toes would curl in pain as he would latch on. But my son needed me and I was ready to do all I could do provide for him.

After our first pediatrician appointment a few days later, we were referred to a lactation consultant (LC) since Hudson hadn't regained his weight. I was so hopeful and grateful to have some one provide me with answers. I had watched the videos, read the books, and attended the classes...what was I doing wrong? Well, I was being a little too gentle. The LC showed me to really push Hudson's head to the breast. It didn't hurt!! I couldn't believe it. I wish I could say that small piece of advice solved our problems, but sadly I wasn't as good at being aggressive with his head when we got home. But we tried and we practiced and we cried and we consulted others and finally...we conquered. When Hudson was around 5 weeks old, nursing no longer hurt!! An accomplishment at last!

I should mention that without the support of my husband, the girls on the Nest, and the other new moms that I spent time with, I'm not sure I would have stuck this out. A great support network is imperative for any first time nursing mom.

But we weren't in the clear yet. I wasn't really prepared for growth spurts, i.e. periods of time when Hudson wanted to eat continuously. I vividly remember this one night...Hudson was up every 20 minutes or so...I was finally in tears telling Ryan that I don't think I can do it...that maybe it's time to break out the formula they gave us at the hospital. Ryan offered to get it, but before he got out of bed, I said "once we give him formula, there's no going back for me. I'm not sure I can be as dedicated to nursing if I know I have an alternative". Saying those words aloud was all I needed. I dutifully took my maternal butt out of bed and went to my "other bed" (the rocking chair). Ever since that moment, there was no turning back.

Throughout our nursing relationship, I loved that I could put Hudson to sleep anytime I wanted just by nursing him, that I could comfort him and make him stop crying by nursing, that I could share special moments with him each evening by nursing. On the other hand, I was starting to get worn down with being the sole provider of comfort (not that Ryan didn't try), that Hudson needed me to fall asleep, that I had trained Hudson to need to nurse to fall asleep. "It's okay", I would tell myself, "we just need to make it to 12 months".

For some unknown reason I had assumed that Hudson would turn one, fall madly in love with milk, and forget about this nursing gig. I couldn't have been more wrong! While I never actively tried to wean, I took a "don't offer, don't refuse" approach. Well, I didn't need to offer since Hudson made it clear when he wanted to nurse! It didn't help that he never took to milk (I tried cow's milk, goat's milk, soy milk, chocolate milk). So I felt obligated to ensure that he got the nutrients he needed.

At 15 months we decided that him waking up every hour all night wasn't working for us (not sure why it took that long to realize!), and we began to sleep train using the Sleep Lady method (see my sleep posts for references). This was great because it allowed Hudson to go to sleep without the breast. And this, I believe, is where the weaning process started.

We started to get down to 1-2 nursing sessions a day since we were no longer doing the night time one. So we would do morning and 5pm. The 5pm session fell off quickly and we were down to just the morning. Hudson would wake up early, Ryan would bring him into our bed and I would nurse him back to sleep for another hour. It was working until I got pregnant. Between nausea and exhaustion, I just couldn't do it. So I would cuddle him and he would put up a fight for a minute, but then he would find the "security mole" (the little mole I have on my breast that Hudson plays with to fall asleep) and calm down. We started this routine and gradually nursing faded out of our lives.

Last Tuesday, June 9th, is that last time I nursed Hudson. It was 4 days shy of his 19 month birthday. Leading up to that day, I would stare at him each time he nursed, realizing that it could be the last time. Sadly, I don't actually recall the details of our last nursing session, but I'll never forget the warmth of holding my little boy close to me, looking down and seeing his angel face, and wondering how I got so lucky.

I'm not a player...

2009-06-09T08:39:00.001-07:00

...I just *KISS* alot!
Two weekends, two hot babes, two kisses for Hudson!

Post-kiss with Izabella...

Hope you're hungry!

2009-06-09T08:25:00.000-07:00

I didn't mean to turn this into a recipe blog, but I've tried some really great things lately and want to share! I love the transition from "winter" to "summer" recipes!

Bread salad with cranberries, spinach, and chicken
This was yummy, but my complaint with all Cooking Light recipes is that they seem to take so long to make! The prep is pretty time-consuming (cubing and toasting bread, prepping the vinaigrette, etc. ). But this was delicious. The only change I made was that I drizzled the bread with a little olive oil and sprinkled some seasoning on before toasting. The fennel and coriander made a great rub for the chicken! I'll be making this again (and will be prepared for the 45 minute prep time).

Chicken orzo salad
Can always count on Rachael Ray for an easy recipe! This was so yummy! In the magazine, the tip she gave was to shave the parmesan with a vegetable peeler. It worked really well. This will definitely be in our summer rotation.

Mango and brie quesadillas with black bean soup
Due to my love of mango salsa, I thought I would try to incorporate it into a meal. So, I made my version of mango salsa and bought some whole wheat tortillas and spreadable brie. I put a little canola oil in a pan, heated, then put in a tortilla with brie spread on it. I spooned the mango salsa onto that tortilla and then topped it with another. I flipped it when the bottom was getting golden and crispy. I served it with this easy black bean soup. I didn't include the jalapeno since I don't do spicy food. I also thought I had couscous, but I didn't, so I threw in some quinoa. The soup was okay, but putting sour cream and chopped cilantro on top really made it taste great. Nice and easy!

Some new recipes

2009-06-02T12:05:00.000-07:00

The nice weather has me cooking some of my old summer classics and some new favorites, so I thought I would share some.

Ever since I visited my good friend, Alexandra, and her sister, Alexis, and brother-in-law, Alexander (try keeping those names straight!) a few years ago, and Alexander made mango salsa, I've been hooked! Heck, growing up in Pgh, I don't even know if I ever had mango before that day! Anyways, I made some last night and I'm enjoying it now. It tastes so good the next day once the flavors have all soaked together. I'll try to post a "recipe", but it's really just a list of ingredients.

Mango salsa
2 mango, diced
1/4 of a red pepper, diced into small pieces (I like to use the alligator for this)
About 1/5 of a purple/red onion, again diced into small pieces with the alligator
1-2 teaspoons of cilantro
Juice of one medium to large lime
drizzle of olive oil
salt and pepper

Combine in bowl and serve with tortilla chips or over chicken/fish.
I should say that putting too much onion or cilantro in ruins it for me, so I would suggest putting in less than you think is necessary and just keep tasting and adding if necessary. I told you this wasn't so much of a recipe! Very imprecise!

I also tried this recipe from Cooking Light and it was delicious! I went with the chipotle powder instead of ancho since I don't like spicy food and it was still really spicy. Next time, I'll cut the amount of chipotle powder.
Ancho Chile-Beef Fajitas with Mango
I served with guacamole and chips (I made my own guacamole, not the recipe listed here).
I should mention that it's supposed to be a 40 minute meal, but to make it more weeknight-friendly, I would probably do all of my chopping the night before.

I don't think I posted this recipe before, and I'm not sure how I overlooked it since it's SO delicious! My friend, Kristen, recommended it and Ryan and I love it! It's also SUPER easy (just need to marinate overnight).
Grilled Marinated Flank Steak

Happy eating!

More updates

2009-06-01T12:45:00.000-07:00

Since I was in catch-up mode for my last post, I knew that I would forget tons of adorable things that Hudson does. So, here's a post of things I forgot....

More words: After listening to Hudson this weekend, I realized I forgot a ton of words. Gone (like if his juice box is empty or if a helicopter flies out of sight), cheese, cracker (which might also mean cookie), blocks, hat, help, bird, duck, eyes, nose, mouth, dog....I'm sure there are even more that I'm forgetting right now.
In addition to those words, he also signs: all done, more, car, train, cracker, grapes, bath, banana, cheese, bird, and sorry (but he only does that one if prompted)
He gives kisses and it's the cutest thing ever. You just ask for a kiss and he delivers!
He knows alot of his body parts. He'll point to: nose, eyes, ears, head, tongue (he sticks it out), belly, and knees (if he has long pants on, he has to pull them up in order to show you his knees).
If he hears people on TV clapping or cheering, he starts to clap too.
He REALLY wants to be able to jump. He keeps trying and trying, but his feet have yet to come off of the ground.

I'm sure there will be many follow-up posts to this since I can't keep up with his development!

I'm baa-aack....

2009-05-12T08:36:00.000-07:00

Yes, so I took an extended blogging leave. It really wasn't by choice. One of my dissertation committee members agreed to be on my committee only if I could set my proposal meeting before the end of May. So you know what that means? Non-stop dissertating! I worked my butt off and now I'm happy to say that my baby has been handed over to the committee. My presentation was on May 22nd and I could have never anticipated it going so well! YAY!

In addition to dissertation bootcamp, I also was on a wedding marathon. Two weddings in two weeks in Long Island? Sure, no problem! We drove up to NJ on April 24th and then headed up to LI on the 25th for Abhisek and Sujata's wedding (college friends) while Ryan's parents watched Hudson. Our blind faith in technology had us trust the GPS to get us to the wedding. Apparently, Onyx (the car/GPS) decided that we should see the Lincoln Tunnel and midtown Manhattan on that beautiful sunny afternoon. Needless to say, we got to the wedding an hour late and missed the entire ceremony. We did, however, get to catch up with a bunch of Ryan's fratenity brothers (including 3 of his little brothers) which was wonderful. After the wedding, we made the trek back to NJ. Our return trip took less than 2 hours, compared to the 3+ it took us to get there.

Less than a week later, we headed to NJ on Thursday April 30th. We headed to LI on Friday afternoon for Jade and Jerrol's wedding (grad school friends). Since we learned from our mistakes, we took a new route (Oynx was not in control this time). Unfortunately, that didn't help. It took us over 3 hours to get there again thanks to Friday afternoon traffic and rain. Again, we missed the ceremony. Despite of bad luck with driving, we had a wonderful time at the wedding and a much easier return trip that evening.

The following day, May 2, we celebrated Ryan's birthday (which is May 4) in NJ with his family and our good friends, Megan, Jay, and Alex. Meg and Jay brought their adorable little girl, Izabella, too. We had a great time catching up and eating TONS of food (including Ryan's Dad's famous lasagna and sangria and a delicious ice cream cake).

So, two weekends packed with travel and one dissertation proposal have affected my ability to blog. But now I'm back and have updates on Hudson....

Well, he gets cuter by the minute (seriously).
He's (finally) starting to grow some hair, albeit more in the back in the form of a curly rat tail.
He's starting to pick up words. Right now he says: car, cat, ball (although this sometimes means "grapes" if he's also signing grapes), juice, Mom, Da, Pop Pop, on, up, down, shoe, owl, out, puff, banana, and apple. I was SO happy to finally hear MOM!!! For the longest time both Ryan and I were "Da".
His cognitive development has been blowing us away too. He's been doing puzzles for a while now. I still have no idea how he learned that. He also can point out a bunch of things in his books (i.e. if you ask where the butterfly is on a certain page, he'll point to it). Again, I have no idea how he learned some of these random words like bumblebee, owl, and butterfly. Just the other day, Joyce (our nanny) told me that he was pointing out red and blue blocks when she asked. He's our little genius!! CMU, here he comes! :)
He LOVES to kick his ball around. We're convinced that he's going to take right to soccer, although we'll probably push him to go the Jeff Reed route instead (sans the crazy hair and penchant for hoochie mamas).
One of his favorite games is when Daddy throws him high into the air (much to Mommy's dismay as she prays to Jesus that Daddy catches him and doesn't break his back). As soon as Ryan catches him, he immediately says "UP!!" and is ready to go again.
He's starting to want to do grown up things. I've given him a little responsibility by letting him feed the cats each morning. He LOVES it! He runs to get the scoop, puts some food in their dishes and then runs back for more. If he spills any, he picks them up and puts them in the dish (although sometimes he chooses to put them in the WATER dish). He seems so proud of his little chore.
He's still 100% obsessed with vacuums. Thanks to my Mom, he has two loud play vacuums that he pushes around all day. But as soon as he spots one of the real vacuums he comes running and just wants to push it all over the place. He even knows that our small Dyson is for cleaning the couch, so he grabs it off of the charger and takes it over to the couch. Hopefully his desire to clean lasts through his teenage years!
He's getting really good at going down the stairs. We tried to teach him to sit on his bum and "scooch" down. As soon as we say "scoochie", he starts to go. Unfortunately, he's getting a little too brave and is starting to go without Mommy or Daddy there to supervise or he tries to walk down. For those of you who have been to our house, you know that there are 50 stairs (literally, we counted), so this gets to be difficult.
He loves to empty Daddy's wallet (Mommy taught him well!). He'll sit there forever just taking credit cards in and out.
As for his sleep, I wish I could say it's great, but sadly, it's not. We did make alot of progess with our sleep training (see previous sleep posts), but we kinda plateaued and didn't move forward. In fact, it seems that we're actually regressing at this point :(
On a better note, he is eating MUCH better. He's finally eating real food and not just crackers! Still not drinking milk, but he LOVES cheerios in milk, so we're getting some in. I think the kid could eat 2 adult sized bowls of cheerios in one sitting!
He's mildly obsessed with dandelions. If he sees them in the grass, he will stand there and yell and point at them until you pick them. Every. Last. One. Of. Them. He's getting brave and beginning to touch them himself.

He just had his 18 month doctor visit. He was in the 70th percentile for height, but only 20th for weight. We so glad that the summer is here so that he can wear shorts and stop rocking the floods!

I hope to find some time soon to post more pictures. I just need to download them from the camera. I haven't even sent out his monthly batch....I know, I'm slacking....

Bloody injury #2

2009-04-08T07:00:00.000-07:00

On Monday we had our second run-in with a bloody face. Ryan and I were making breakfast and Hudson was standing about 4 feet behind us, playing with his vacuum. All of a sudden we heard a *SMACK* and then the wailing. I ran over to Hudson, picked him up, and started to look for signs of injury. His mouth was full of blood. All 8 of his front teeth were soaked red. He wouldn't let me look inside, so I still don't actually know what was bleeeding (gums, lips, tongue). He refused a frozen teething ring. I sat and nursed him to calm him down. Then he unlatched himself and went right back to playing as if nothing happened. This boy is tough, or as we like to say, he's got a little Heath in him!

We still have no idea how he fell (he didn't hear him running).

Guess this is the life of a parent of a little boy. Note to self: buy popsicles for mouth injuries.

Our little conversationist

2009-04-08T06:50:00.000-07:00

In addition to his words that we can actually understand (car, ball, up, juice), Hudson is well-versed in his own language. His Pop Pop stopped by on a drive to North Carolina and called Hudson's Mom Mom so that she could say hello. Hudson sure had some stories to tell them! (It's pretty cute around the 1:35 mark).

Full of tricks

2009-04-02T06:16:00.000-07:00

I went to feed Hudson dinner the other night. I opened the refrigerator and asked him what he wanted. He threw his hands up as if to say "I don't know". Now, whenever I say "I don't know", he puts his hands like this. There's a short video at the bottom that shows him in action :)

Yummy breakfast recipe

2009-03-31T07:03:00.001-07:00

I found this recipe a few weeks ago and we have had it almost every day for breakfast since! For some reason, Ryan renamed it "gruel" instead of "muesli" though. Even Hudson loves it!!

Muesli with cranberry and flaxseed

I followed the recipe the first time, but since then, we skip the milk. Soaking it in milk makes it mushy and we like it crunchy. I also skip the toasted nuts now (just out of laziness). So I combine the first 7 ingredients and store them in the refrigerator (wheat germ and ground flaxseed need to be refrigerated). When we want to eat some "gruel", I just put some Stonyfield French Vanilla yogurt in a bowl and top it with this mixture. So yummy and healthy!

"How strong is Hudson?"

2009-03-25T16:27:00.001-07:00

Joyce, our nanny, taught Hudson a new trick today and Ryan and I can't get enough of it! When you ask him "How strong is Hudson?", he clenches all of his muscles. It started because he was playing with one of my resistance bands and Joyce was showing him how to pull it to work his muscles.

Here's a video of him showing his strength: (at the end of the video we also tried to get him to do another one of his tricks - his evil laugh (Mwah-ha-ha-ha)).

Here's a picture of him showing us how strong he is...Ryan and I were literally in tears from laughing so hard.

It was good while it lasted...

2009-03-17T16:33:00.000-07:00

Our one giant leap forward a few weeks ago has been met with a few steps backwards. Those few nights of glorious sleep are just a dream at this point (I'm still not sure if I was actually daydreaming them or if I'm now stuck in a nightmare).

Right after I posted my last sleep message, I hit "Publish Post" and then I heard it. Those shrilling screams of exhaustion that I thought we had conquered. I guess Hudson was going to teach me to brag about his great sleeping skills! Ryan was trying to get him to sleep, but he was hysterical unless Ryan put his hand on him. The screams were heart-wrenching (worse than our first few nights of training), so Ryan obliged. You obviously know where this got us...Hudson wanting us to put our hand on him until he falls asleep. We fell into the trap that the Sleep Lady warned us about: "Don't replace one sleep crutch with another." Hudson outsmarted us at our own game.

Since that dreadful night, he's been pretty difficult to get to sleep (I'm actually typing this while Ryan is sitting with him in his room. It must not be going so well because I'm 2 levels below him with the office door closed and I hear his cries). As if that's not bad enough, he's waking up 3-4 times a night now.

On a positive note....3-4 times is less than 7-8 times each night! Also, it's much easier to get him back to sleep in the middle of the night. I can just lay him down, put on his music, and stand there for a minute or two.

I'm doing lots of complaining here, so I just wanted to end this post with a positive reminder of how Ry and I are getting through these sleep issues....just look at that face!

Where's Hudson???

2009-03-17T16:31:00.000-07:00

Has anyone seen him?????
:)

Uh-oh...our first "semi-serious" injury....

2009-03-16T09:18:00.000-07:00

I was working in the office downstairs this morning while Hudson was upstairs with Joyce. I heard a "THUD!" and then a shrilling scream. I ran upstairs and Joyce had picked Hudson up and was holding him. She was holding him tight to her with his head by her shoulder. She didn't notice that he was gushing blood all over her and the floor. I took him and saw that the blood was coming out of his nose. I held a tissue to it and it stopped pretty shortly thereafter. I was obviously shaken up. I called the doctor and the nurse told me that if it's not deformed (it isn't), if his eyes aren't bruised (they're not), and the nose isn't sore to the touch (it isn't), then it's probably not broken. By the time I was hanging up with the nurse, Hudson was back to his old self asking for crackers.

I think what happened was that he was running (pushing his vacuum) and he tripped and smacked his face off of the ceramic tile. Poor little guy! :(

If he continues to run around the house, I might have to look into a toddler version of this:

Hudson's girlfriend visits

2009-03-10T16:47:00.000-07:00

When Ryan and I were on our honeymoon, we met another couple, Jess and Mike, who were also on their honeymoon (we were on a cruise, so we were seated together for dinner). We instantly bonded with them and traveled all of the Mediterranean together. Well, they happened to live in Virginia, only an hour away!! So we've stayed in touch and try to get together every month or two, especially since we're grooming Hudson and Layla (their daughter) to be spouses one day :)
This past weekend, they came up to Baltimore and we all enjoyed the beautiful weather in the Harbor and Fells Point. Ryan wanted to be sure to document it so that they had pictures for their wedding slideshow!

Layla is showing Hudson something on the ground

The cutest picture of Layla!!

The family enjoying the first Pitango trip of the season

Hudson has his first taste of Pitango

Sleep update

2009-03-10T16:29:00.001-07:00

I know that alot of people have been checking back for sleep updates. The reason that I haven't posted any is because not too much is new. He's still sleeping as well as he was on the last sleep post. We haven't done the last stage of the "shuffle" yet which is putting him in his crib awake and walking out of the room. Right now a typical night looks like this:

*Between 6:30-7:30, I nurse Hudson in his room with the lights on.
*About 10-15 minutes later, Ryan gets Hudson in his bath.
*Between 7-8, Ryan puts him in his crib with the music on and Ryan lays on the floor by the doorway. Hudson walks around the crib for a while, fusses for a minute or two, lays down and goes to sleep. It usually takes 15-45 minutes for him to lay down and go to bed.
*He might wake up once throughout the night (He has woken up twice before, but we were dealing with new teeth and a runny nose). If he does wake up, we just pick him up, hold him for a second to calm him down, put the music back on, and lay him back in his crib. He goes right back to bed.
*The downside to all of this is that his new wake up time is 5am. Even after we changed the clocks! I try to get him back to bed since I think he's still tired (he's crying and not happy), but it never works. So I go down stairs, turn on the lights, and nurse. One of the problems might be that he doesn't eat much at night, so he's waking up due to hunger. But he usually won't eat when I bring him down, just nurses, so I'm not sure.

I'm absolutely amazed at how well the Shuffle method worked for us. My parents and Ryan's parents can attest to how awful Hudson was when it came to sleeping. This has been a miracle!

He's a maniac!

2009-02-27T11:39:00.000-08:00

I'm sure these videos are going to be overkill (since they are all essentially the same thing), but they're so freakin' cute!

Here's a little background....
Hudson is addicted to Signing Time DVDs. The one DVD has a music video for this techno/dance song. This morning as soon as the song came on, he jumped on his zebra, and started to bounce like a maniac. I got him halfway through the song (the 1st video). Then he jumped off and asked me to play the video again. As soon as the music came on, he started bouncing again. You can also see his love for Rachel (the host). I ask him where she is and he points to the TV.

After seeing these videos, it's no surprise that he took a 2.5 hour nap! :)

Probably a bad idea...

2009-02-27T10:06:00.000-08:00

...to teach Hudson to play ball in the house!

Night #7

2009-02-27T07:28:00.000-08:00

Well, we have another successful night! I'm considering sending Kim West (the Sleep Lady) a diamond necklace or something! We can't begin to thank her and her book enough! As someone who believes in Attachment Parenting, I never thought I would find a sleep "training" that felt right. I'm so glad that this method not only worked with Hudson, but also fit into our parenting philosophy.

Hudson took a nap at a much better time finally. He slept from 12-2p.

Well, the bedtime wasn't as great as last night. I nursed, Ryan bathed him, read to him, and put him in bed. Ryan stayed in the door way again. Although we already did 3 doorway nights, we skipped the 3 nights of moving halfway across the room since his room is small. So we figured it might be a little too soon to move to the hallway.

Hudson walked around and played for a little. But all of a sudden Ryan said he sat in the corner and started to scream and cry. He hugged him and calmed him down. Then he snuggled with his blankets and went to sleep. So it wasn't bad by any means, but he did cry a little.

But the night time was amazing...he didn't even wake up ONCE! So I never heard him cry at all. At 6:15a I did start to panic and wonder if he was still breathing. At 6:40a, we heard him in there talking to him self. So not only did he sleep all night, he also woke up HAPPY!!!

Kim West, I love you! :)

Night #6

2009-02-27T07:19:00.000-08:00

Well, we had our best bedtime yet this evening!
I decided to nurse before Hudson's bath. It seemed like nursing afterwards would get him drowsy, but then when I would put him down he was like "Hey, what's going on here???" and would protest. So tonight we did:
Nurse
Bath
Pajamas
Books
Lights out with music box on and Daddy in the doorway on the floor

I was downstairs cleaning up and I didn't hear anything. About 30 minutes later Ryan walked into the kitchen. I was confused...I didn't hear any crying. Well, that's because Hudson didn't cry at all!! Ryan said Hudson was walking around in his crib and he kept putting his head down on his blankets and then would get up and walk again. Finally he just put his head down and went to sleep. We think that he's starting to become comforted by his blankets.

Unfortunately, the night wasn't as great. he woke up a few time (I wrote them down in the dark and can't read them). Ryan had to actually go into his room twice because he was worked up. Ryan just hugged him, put his music back on, and he was back to sleep in about 10 minutes.

He woke up around 5:40a. He was fussing, so he probably needed to sleep more, but it didn't happen.

NIght #5

2009-02-25T07:58:00.000-08:00

After the early morning wake-up, Hudson took his nap from 10:15a-12:15p...WAY too early!! The Sleep Lady advises that the child go to bed 4 hours after he wakes from a nap. Since a 4p bedtime wasn't going to happen, I was hoping that he would take another nap...no such luck. Fortunately, he made it through the day and evening and was relatively pleasant. He didn't want the meatloaf that he scarfed down the night before, so he had a dinner of diced apples and some edamame (not sure how this kid didn't inherit mine and Ryan's love of food!). Ryan got him his bath, I nursed and read, Ryan put him down. I came downstairs at 7:01p and he was quiet for a long time. I was shocked to think that he went to bed without a fight! But, lo and behold, he eventually started to cry. Ryan came downstairs at 7:50p. He said that Hudson was playing for a while (when he was quiet). I think the nursing gives him a second wind because he's really drowsy while nursing, but wide awake afterwards. So we're going to have to move that (maybe to before bathtime) until it's cut altogether).

He started to cry at 9:15p. He seemed to be escalating, but we continued to wait. He was back to sleep on his own within 2-3 minutes.

He woke at 3:19p and was pretty upset. Ryan went in. He doesn't remember the specifics, but thinks that Hudson was back to sleep within 30 mins. Ryan just sat in the doorway - he didn't pick him up or anything.

He was crying around 5:40a. I was thinking that he was still tired, so I sent Ryan to put him back to sleep (i.e. sit in the doorway). Ryan ended up bringing him to me. I don't want to begin to bring him into bed again, so I got up with him and came downstairs. He still seemed tired, but we were beyond the point where he would go back down. We're probably in for another early nap today....

15 month doctor check-up

2009-02-23T18:18:00.001-08:00

Off to the doctors!

One of these days I'm going to insert info from all of Hudson's appointments so that you can see how he has grown. But that's going to have to wait until I have "spare time" (hahaha, yeah right!). So I guess you're just stuck with an update from today's appointment.

Hudson is weighing in at a mere 23 lbs (30th percentile) and measuring 31 inches (50th percentile). And his head circumference still is in first place: 65th percentile (48.5cm).

The pediatrician said that he looks great. At his 12 month visit, they took blood to check his iron levels and screen for lead. He was borderline anemic then, so she scheduled more lab work today. I cringed when I heard that because that meant holding him down so that she could draw blood from his inner elbow. It just broke my heart last time...tying his little arm, looking for a vein, draining his blood. So I was prepared for the worst. (Thankfully Ryan was there with me!). Well Hudson laid down and sat there calmly, watching inquisitively as they drew the blood. He never made a peep!! I was so proud of him!!

The two vaccines in the leg were to follow. He let out a little whimper, but then was laughing. Whatta tough little guy!!

Night #4

2009-02-23T18:10:00.000-08:00

Last night, we may have had our best bedtime to date. I nursed very briefly and left Hudson with Ryan at 7:17p. Ryan walked him for a few minutes (he worked late and needed some cuddle time with his little monkey man!). He put him down, drowsy but awake then laid on the floor in front of Hudson's doorway (It was the first night of "shuffling" to the door instead of next to the crib. I asked Ryan if he wanted me to bring up a chair since the recliner in Hudson's room is too big to move and he said he wanted to lay down...must be getting tired from all of his great "coaching"!). Hudson cried at first, but again, it wasn't that all out, hysterical cry. It was just a step above a whine. He started to test Ryan again by throwing his music box and one blanket out of the crib. During our first night or two, we would give in and give him his things back. But we realized that we were getting duped for attention so that had to end (thankfully, Ryan's not a softie like me!). So Ryan just ignored it. Hudson laid down pretty much right after that. But everytime Ryan would get up to leave, Hudson would start to cry. So Ryan would sit back down. This happened a few times until Ryan came downstairs at 7:55p. While the actually time may have taken a little longer, Ryan didn't have to go and pat him or hug him at all after he put him down. Another accomplishment!!

As for the rest of the night....it was wonderful! HE SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT!!! HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!!! I never thought this night would come!!

I guess I should clarify...Hudson did wake up at 2:50 and some other time that I can't read since it was scribbled. I heard him cry a little, but we just waited and he fell back to sleep. So, by "sleeping through the night", I mean that we didn't have to get out of bed.

Unfortunately, I was up a few times anyways. Once I heard him cry a little, I waited to see if he went back to sleep. When he did, I was like a kid on Christmas morning...my excitement was keeping me awake!! I can't wait until this loses its novelty and I can sleep again!

Hudson woke up at 5:55a. It was a bit early and I knew that he wouldn't make it through until his 12p nap. But he didn't seem interested in going back to sleep. So, I gladly celebrated this accomplishment with my happy, well-rested little monkey!

Night #3

2009-02-23T12:45:00.000-08:00

I started to get a bit ahead of myself in the Night #2 post and mentioned his night #3 bedtime. To recap, he went in at 7:22p and was asleep by 8:11p.

After he was asleep, I read a little more of the Sleep Lady book. I am planning on weaning from nursing once we get through this sleep coaching a bit. In the book, it mentioned that Daddy should take over during the weaning phase. It makes sense - the little one has associated Mommy with nursing and sleep and is going to protest (loudly!) if she sits there and doesn't do anything. I asked Ryan to take over the entire coaching gig and he didn't even bat an eye and said yes (I really, really love my husband!)

He was crying at 9:53p. It didn't sound like a strong cry (moms, you know what I mean!), so I let him go for a minute. He put himself back to sleep very quickly, within a minute or two. So we didn't even have to go in!! Yay!!

He was up at 1:10a. Ryan went in, but came back to bed by 1:13a. So either I wrote that down wrong or it was a really quick visit!! Ryan was a little sleep-deprived this morning and could recall the details.

He was up at 4:27a. As Ryan went in, I realized that my throat was a bit sore. I attributed it to the heat and the dry air and thus needed to drink some water. I thought Hudson might be having the same problem, so I brought him a sippy cup up. When I opened his door, I saw Ryan kneeling next to his crib patting him. I handed him the cup and Hudson saw and got worked up a bit. Therefore it took a little longer to get to sleep. He wasn't back to bed until 5:00a.

He woke up at 6:20a (I think - I forgot to write it down and Ryan and I are now debating whether it was 6:20 or 7:20a). When I got him, he still seemed a bit tired. I tried to lay him back down, but he kept getting up. I figured that it wasn't worth sitting with him for 30 minutes until he went to sleep since he would have to get up shortly thereafter anyways (he had a doctor's appointment this morning).

All in all, it was a good night. Ryan and I have talked about scaling back and making sure that we don't pat him too much and really just sit there (no interaction). The patting must be limited to the times when he's so upset that he's having a hard time breathing. We don't want to just replace nursing/walking with patting!

I was nervous for throwing his nap schedule off since I knew he would fall asleep on the way to and from the doctor's. He "napped" from 9:15a-9:30a and also 11:15a-11:30a. He wasn't pretty unhappy after that second cat nap, but I knew that it would be bad news for him to take him full nap that early. So, we got home and he had lunch. Joyce, our nanny, took over. We talked with her about the method and she was willing to try. She said that he was rubbing his eyes around 1p, so she took him upstairs and he was asleep by 1:15p! I'm not surprised - he's always better behaved for her!

Tonight we "shuffle" our way to the door instead of next to the crib. We're anticipating a spike in the protesting, but hoping it's not too bad.

NIght #2

2009-02-22T16:58:00.001-08:00

We went out to dinner with some friends this evening, but we made sure we were back with enough time to get Hudson his bath and get him to bed. Due to his late nap, we figured that he would need to be asleep around 8p.

We gave him his bath, got him ready for bed, and I nursed/read books around 7:45. I handed him over to Ryan at 8p when he put him into the crib. He was asleep by 8:30p!! Amazing!!

He started to cry at 9:45p. I was just getting into bed to read so Ryan came up to get him. I stopped Ryan before he went in Hudson's room because he sounded like he was calming down. Ryan didn't go in and Hudson just went back to sleep on his own! We're definitely making progress!

He woke up at 11:03p. And I honestly don't remember if I went in or if Ryan did, but I wrote down that he was back asleep by 11:29p.

He was crying again at 3:40a. I don't have a "back to sleep" time written so either he went back to sleep without us going in or Ryan went in and I didn't get an update (as you can see, the sleep deprivation is getting to my memory!)

He was up at 5:30a. Ryan went in and realized that Hudson pooped. So changing his diaper made him upset and he was still a bit tired, so he started to get really worked up. I went in around 6:10a with some water because he was crying so hard. He didn't want the water. Since he didn't eat much for dinner, I started to wonder if he was hungry. I sent Ryan back to bed and I nursed Hudson, but didn't allow him to fall asleep at the breast. But when I would put him down he would get REALLY worked up. I think the nursing became somewhat of a tease to him and he was really protesting. It took all of my willpower to sit back and not take him out of the crib and nurse him to sleep. He was obviously still tired and had big tears rolling down his cheeks while he stood in his crib looking at me, his eyes begging me to hold him. It tugged at every one of my heartstrings. I finally picked him up, gave him a hug, and laid him back down. He put his hand on his little duck lovey/silky, and fell asleep within a minute or two. He woke up at 8:50a for the day (and he was actually happy and not crying when he woke up - he hasn't done that in a while!).

Ryan took him swimming this afternoon while I ran errands. They went to the gym a little late, so Hudson fell asleep in the car around 12:15. He slept until about 2p.

He was pretty fussy this evening. We struggled to get any dinner in him once again. He was rubbing his eyes and melting down around 5p. We got him into the bath a little earlier, around 6p. After his bath, we tried some more dinner. Then he played for a while. I nursed and read books around 7p and handed him off to Ryan at 7:22p. He was asleep by 8:11p.

Hoping for another good night....

Night #1

2009-02-21T11:03:00.000-08:00

Not only did we survive the first night of sleep coaching (see previous post), we did great! Everyone said that it won't be as bad as you expect it to be. And I was thinking "well, they don't know my kid and his willpower!". But, fortunately, they were right! It wasn't nearly as bad as I expected.

Here's the timeline of what went down:

The Sleep Lady recommends getting good naps in on the first day you're going to sleep coach. So, when Hudson was looking tired at 7:30a (after waking up at 6:15a), I gladly nursed him to sleep. He only takes one nap each day and it's usually from 12-2 or 1-3p, so this morning nap was very unusual. He slept for about 1.5 hours. He then took his afternoon nap from 12:15-2p. Now the problem with this is that the Sleep Lady recommends your child should be asleep 4 hours after he wakes from his afternoon nap (although she says you can stretch it until 5 hours, but doesn't prefer that). So this means that Hudson should be asleep between 6-7p.

Okay, now to the nitty gritty....

At dinner, Hudson wouldn't eat much (not unusual) and started rubbing his eyes. I quickly had Ryan take him up for his bath. In the bath, he started to get fussy (which is a sign he's tired because otherwise he loves his bath). So we quickly got him out, put some lotion on/gave a little massage, and got into pajamas. Instead of Ryan reading to him and then handing him to me to nurse, we decided that I would nurse while Ryan read to him. That way, we could keep him awake while nursing. After a few books, I handed him over to Ryan and went down stairs. That was at 6:50p.

Hudson cried and fussed, but wasn't hysterical. Ryan picked up once or twice when he was really crying and gasping for air, soothed him and asked him to calm down. Then he would lie him back down. Ryan knelt next to the crib and Hudson grabbed him and hugged him. Ryan laid him back down. Hudson cried. Then he came to hug Ryan again, Ryan laid him down, and he just looked up and closed his eyes. This was at 8:01p.

He woke up at 10:48p. I went in the room this time. I told him it was time to go "night-night" and I placed him on his back (he was standing when I walked in). He protested a bit, but wasn't too bad. I just sat in the rocker and pretended to sleep by closing my eyes. A couple of times he got worked up and I would just go over, kneel down, hug him and tell him "night night". He has this music box in his crib (it also has lights that project onto the ceiling):

So he started to push the buttons for the music and lights. Then he laid face down onto his crib with his arm over the music box. And then just fell asleep! I couldn't believe it since that was the first time that I ever got him to sleep without nursing! I waited a few minutes and moved the music box a bit (since it's pretty hard and probably not a good snuggle buddy!). When I got back to bed it was 11:26p.

At 3:41a he woke again. This time Ryan went in. Given the time, I didn't get all of the details on what happened, but I know that he eventually laid down ON TOP of his music box (it was under his belly) and fell asleep like that. Ryan obviously moved him off of it. When Ryan got back to bed it was 4:48a.

Hudson was crying again at 6:11a. I wasn't sure whether I should try to get him back to sleep or if he was up for the day. So I tried to sit in the chair and tell him it was okay, but then he started "talking" and playing, so I took it as a sign that he was up!

We had a great morning. We took him to a playgroup and he usually falls asleep afterwards. When we got home, we gave him a snack and decided that it was nap time. I took him up and nursed until he was drowsy (this was about 11:55a). But once I would put him down, he would get up and start playing. He was just playing and walking back and forth - no fussing or crying. So I just sat there. Then I tried to nurse again to get him drowsy. But once I put him down, he was ready to play again. Finally Ryan came up at 1:11p. Hudson started to cry and was getting tired. Ryan sat with him and he was finally asleep by 1:30p.

He woke up during the nap and was holding his blanket. So Ryan laid him down and covered him and he went back to sleep and is still sleeping now.

UPDATE: He woke up from his nap at 3:45p.

With only 2 awakenings last night (compared to our normal 5-7/night), I would have to say that Day 1 was a success!!

Hudson meets his cousin!

2009-02-20T17:27:00.000-08:00

When we went back to Pittsburgh for the AFC Championship game, we got to meet my brother's daughter, Riley, for the first time. She wasn't even a month old yet! It was amazing to see such a little peanut (she was only 5 lbs 9 oz when she was born!). While Hudson was never that small, I can't even remember him being little and delicate.
Hudson loves seeing little babies - he gets really excited to see someone smaller than him!

"Here is Riley's mouth..."

"...now I'm going to grab her nose..."

"...and now look how big I look next to her!"

We're in for a looooong night....

2009-02-20T16:58:00.001-08:00

Well, tonight begins our first night of sleep coaching. After 15 months of sleep deprivation (and even more if you count all of those late night pee breaks while I was pregnant), I'm desperate for a solution to our sleeping woes. I went to a Sleep Lady seminar this week. The Sleep Lady (aka Kim West) has a method called the Sleep Lady Shuffle. Basically, what this means is that you put your child into his crib drowsy and then sit next to his bed until he's asleep. You can pick him up if he's really throwing a fit, but you don't want him to fall asleep in your arms. You're "coaching" him to fall asleep on his own, while being there in the room with him to let him know that you haven't just abandoned him (which is why I couldn't bring myself to do the Ferber method). You also do this same thing when he wakes up in the middle of the night (which I'm really dreading). You do this for 3-4 nights, then you "shuffle" your chair to the doorway (instead of next to the crib). After a few days, you "shuffle" yourself out to the hallway.

My wonderful husband has agreed to take on the first few nights of coaching. As I began typing this post, I could hear Hudson still upstairs crying. We started at 6:50p and I was expecting him to go for hours (Hudson has a willpower like no one else I've ever met). Well, I heard someone in our living room (I'm in the office on the first floor) so I ran up to see what the sound was. It was Ryan! I looked at the clock and it was 8:01p! After only 71 minutes, Hudson was asleep! Let's hope the rest of the night goes as smoothly!

I'll try to post updates throughout the week. (A little something called a dissertation has been cutting in on my blogging time!)

UPDATE: I was thinking that I'll post an update each night that we do this coaching so that maybe other people thinking about the method can learn from what we've done. I thought it would be most helpful to give some background information on Hudson and his sleep.

Hudson is 15 months old. When he was first born, he was a pretty good sleeper. Up until about 6 months, he would only wake up around 1-2x/night to nurse. Right at 6 months, his sleep went down hill and never recovered. I think sleep regressions and teething are to blame (for great info on sleep regressions, check out askmoxie.org or the book "The Wonder Weeks"). He started waking multiple times each night. Before we started to sleep coach, he was waking up every 1.5-2 hours all night long.

Early on, we fell into the habit of nursing to sleep. I nursed him to bed every single night. I would wait until he was asleep and then put him down. We never did the "drowsy, but awake" thing. If Ryan would try to put him to bed, he would have to walk him up and down our hallway for about an hour while Hudson rested his head on Ryan's shoulder and eventually fell asleep. At every night wakening we had to use one of these methods (nursing or walking). So you can imagine how exhausted we are!!

Every time Hudson would wake up (either in the middle of the night or in the morning), he would be standing in his crib crying. There were many nights where we would try to soothe him back to sleep by just patting him and shushing him (without picking him up) and he would stand up and protest. He could go forever! So we always caved and picked him up. I just want to highlight how ingrained our habits are. These are the reasons that I wasn't hopeful for any type of sleep training - Hudson has more stamina that Ryan or I do! Also, I've never once seen him lay back down after he was standing up, so that wasn't promising.

Part of the reason that I never wanted to "sleep train" was because we try to practice Attachment Parenting. After reading the Dr. Sears Sleep Book, one of his mantras was "Beware of sleep trainers". So I was afraid of breaking the strong bond that we have with Hudson. Dr. Sear's approved of the "No Cry Sleep Solution", but after reading the book, it looked like that method required way too much committment on my part (because it has to do with the nursing piece) and I wouldn't be receiving much help from Ryan. I was too tired to take on this massive task by myself!

So, here's to our attempt at the Shuffle. I'll tag all of these posts with "sleep", so you should be able to follow our progress. If you have any questions, please feel free to leave a comment and I'll get back to you.

Just since I haven't posted anything lately, here are some pictures of my precious baby (who's ASLEEP!!! I still can't believe it!)

"Driving" at the park

Rockin' the Elmer Fudd look

Signing "all done"

Being a ham and giving Mommy "squishy face"

It's playoff time!

2009-01-23T11:20:00.000-08:00

Hudson is truly part of Steeler Nation! Check him out watching the game intently with his Dad and clapping....

....or cheering with joy over the Steelers victory!!

Much to Daddy's dismay....

2009-01-23T11:10:00.000-08:00

...Hudson shares his mother's love for jewelry. Thanks to Megan, I have more jewelry than I can house. My wonderful husband bought me a big jewelry armoire (although I need about 2 more to fit everything that I have!). I was going through all of my old stuff, trying to figure out what to get rid of and how to organize what I was keeping. Hudson decided that he wanted in on the action.

Delicious and easy!

2009-01-23T11:05:00.001-08:00

Any meal that can be described by those two adjectives sounds good to me!
I made this the other night and thought it was fantastic! I cut the amount of chipotle and adobo sauce drastically (I'm not a fan of spicy food).

Sloppy Chipotle Joes

I actually thought the leftovers were even better than the first day!

Christmas in review

2009-01-21T16:18:00.000-08:00

Christmas was a bit different for us this year. It was the first time we spent it without our families. Both sets of our parents couldn't make it to Maryland, so we spent the day with just the three of us. I was really sad about it, but we ended up having a great holiday.

On Christmas Eve, we watched Christmas movies and had a nice dinner at home, while we waited for "Santa".

Hudson on Christmas Eve looking like an angel...and a devil!

On Christmas morning, we opened presents, went to church, and came home to make a champagne brunch for 2 (we're trying to limit Hudson's champagne intake until he's at least 3).

We just hung around the house and played with all of the new toys (although Hudson seemed more interested in the OLD toys!).

Hudson started a new trick of bending over and waiting for someone to flip him forward in a somersault.

That evening we had brisket (yes, a Jewish meal on Christmas - Ryan won't let me forget that one!), sweet potatoes, and broccolini.

The following Saturday we drove up to New Jersey to see Ryan's family where Hudson added more toys to his never-ending collection. He also became quite obsessed with his Pop Pop's asparagus cooker.

We all drove up to Connecticut to visit Ryan's aunt, uncle, and cousins for New Year's Eve. There, Hudson made friends with Bear, the dog.

He also became a fan of the pool table. Not playing pool, per se, but rather standing on the table and kicking the balls.

And learned how to order a drink at the bar.

CHEERS!

Please forgive me!

2009-01-21T15:55:00.000-08:00

Okay, so I've been reprimanded by many readers for my lack of posts lately. The holidays combined with Hudson's refusal to sleep, holiday travel, that pesky dissertation, and (currently) new TV shows have kept me from my computer at night. Alright, so you don't want to hear my excuses? I know a way to make you forgive me....

There! How can you be upset after seeing that adorable smile?!?

So time to catch everyone up...

Child abuse?

2008-12-22T12:35:00.000-08:00

My good friend Jodi saw these pictures and called them child abuse. I guess I could have emotionally scarred my son with these pics, but they're too cute for me to care!

"Uhhhh, Mom, the snowman is on BACKWARDS!"

"These pictures are going to come back and haunt me one day, I just know it!"

"Let me just smile and get this over with"

Our first hematoma

2008-12-08T15:59:00.000-08:00

I have obsessively documented all of Hudson's firsts, from first foods to first steps. This weekend brought a new one...his first (and hopefully last!) hematoma.

On Saturday evening, after his bath, Ryan asked me to look at Hudson's gum in the back. There was a big purplish bump on it. In fact, it looked a little like this (disclaimer: this is NOT a picture of Hudson):

A bit panicked, I called the on-call pediatrician. As I explained the lump, she automatically diagnosed it as a hematoma due to his 12 month molars coming in. She explained that sometimes the tooth bursts a blood vessel before erupting through the skin and forms this hematoma and that it's nothing to worry about. She advised against her grandmothers method of healing a hematoma - rubbing the gum with a golden thimble (I have no idea why it was a "golden" thimble - I was too horrified by the thought of this to ask.)

It looks like a little molar is making it's way through now. After a few weeks of long, sleepless nights full of crying (usually by me...it was that bad, seriously!), I think we're on the road to quiet nights. After almost 13 months of multiple awakenings, Hudson only woke up ONCE on Friday night. Saturday night wasn't as good and Sunday was a step in the wrong direction, but I'm holding out hope!

The innocence of a child

2008-12-04T12:58:00.000-08:00

I was coming home from school today and Silent Night was on the radio ('tis the season!). When I heard the lyrics "Son of God, love's pure light" I got a bit choked up thinking about Hudson for a couple of reasons.

1. I was just reminded that he (and all children) truly are miracles. I'm not quite sure what I did to be worthy of such a blessing, but I'm grateful every day. Being a mother (and wife) brings a fulfillment that is indescribable.

2. I thought of how simplistic items can bring him such joy (specifically, I was thinking about him being in awe of Christmas lights). This led me to think about his curiosity in everyday things and I was amazed by his development. I can't even begin to write how proud I am of him for learning his sign language. And that's just the beginning of his accomplishments. My train of thought caused me to think about all he will do in his lifetime and how he is the future of the world. It's almost too much for me to comprehend. Pride is an understatement to the emotion I was feeling when I looked into our future.

3. Lastly, I began to think of Hudson's innocence. He has yet to know what "hate" is. He doesn't understand "disadvantage". In his world, there is no such thing as "inequality" (unless you're comparing peas and cookies - clearly not "equals" in his eyes!). My professional work is in stark contrast to Hudson's world, where I deal with disproportionality on a daily basis. In Hudson's eyes, the world is full of love, a place where smiles and giggles are a part of everyday life. Everyone is a potential friend and playmate. I hope that I can take a cue from Hudson this holiday season (and all year through) and see life through the eyes of an innocent child.

Atomic chicken?

2008-12-03T13:58:00.000-08:00

As I was planning our weekly dinner menu, I came across a recipe in my binder for Atomic Chicken. I honestly have no idea where this came from. But it had 4 ingredients and looked easy, so I gave it a whirl. It was pretty good. (Warning: it's a little sweet)

4-6 chicken breasts (I only used 3)
1/2 jar of Smuckers Apricot preserves
1 bottle of Wishbone deluxe French salad dressing
1 pack of Lipton's onion soup mix

Mix the soup, preserves, and dressing. Pour over chicken in a casserole dish. Cover and bake on 350 for 45 minutes.

I served it over couscous (with the sauce poured over it) and a side of steamed broccoli. It's a great simple recipe for weeknights.

Good, easy cold weather dinner

2008-12-02T11:02:00.000-08:00

A bunch of friends were talking about this Stuffed Pepper Soup, so I decided to give it a whirl. It was super easy and super delicious!

Stuffed Pepper Soup
1 lb ground beef
1 envelope dry onion soup mix
1 can (14.5 ounces) diced tomatoes
1 can (15 ounces) tomato sauce
1 cup cooked white rice
2 large green bell peppers, chopped
1 beef bouillon cube
1/8 cup packed brown sugar
2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
1 1/4 cups water
mozzarella cheese for finishing (optional)

In a large pot, brown beef thoroughly. Drain grease and return to pot. - Stir in dry soup mix and heat thoroughly.

Add remaining ingredients (except rice) and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 30-40 minutes or until peppers are soft. Add rice and heat through.

Scoop into bowls and sprinkle with mozzarella cheese.
Makes 5 servings.

A football-less Sunday!

2008-11-23T17:32:00.000-08:00

Ryan and I have considered counseling for our football addiction. Having NFL Ticket gives us full access to all of the games, so every Sunday is spent (read: wasted) watching football. Since the Steelers didn't play today, we decided to pry ourselves from the TV and have a great Sunday with Hudson. We went to a new restaurant for breakfast (Momma's on the Half Shell). Ryan enjoyed it a little more than I did since he had oysters, a bloody mary, and a seafood omelet (yuck). Afterwards, we did a little grocery shopping before getting Hudson home for a nap. Since our nights have been pretty rough (thanks Hudson!), we decided to also nap, so by 12p, we were all snoozing. When Hudson woke up, we got him some lunch and headed out for our fun-filled Sunday!

Our first stop was Storyville. We learned about Storyville through our playgroup. This place is amazing! It's part of the public library in the County. It has all of these different rooms to explore, learn, and play. (I can't really do it justice - check out the website for more details.). And amazingly, it's FREE! Here are a few pics of Hudson having fun:

"Rocking the boat" in the Toddler Bay

Doing some shopping at the Storyville Store

Playing with magnets in the Construction Zone

Pushing the trains around inside the clubhouse

Then we headed to Olly Shoes since Hudson is running all over the place and needed proper footwear. This place is pretty awesome. They have a scanning machine that scanned Hudson's bare foot in order to get him properly sized. The staff is very knowledgable and helpful in finding the right shoes. They have the basic brands (Robeez, Pediped, See Kai Run), but they also have tons of fun European brands that will be sure to raise Hudson to "hipster" status. I wanted to warn all Moms...shoe addictions will extend on to your children. Once your little one needs shoes, you'll be tempted to break the bank. I (well, maybe Ryan) cut me off after 3 pairs. Here is a pic of Hudson getting sized:

Hudson's reaction to learning that he's a size 5!

We were in Hunt Valley town centre (which is a nice outdoor mall)for Olly, so we walked around, got warm lattes, and enjoyed the Christmas tree they were decorating. Then we headed over to Wegman's to get some dinner to bring home. Hudson took a little snooze in the car. We got home and all ate (Hudson even enjoyed some of my meatloaf). To quote Ice Cube, "today was a good day'.

Hudson walking and conversing with Achilles

2008-11-19T17:22:00.000-08:00

I thought I should post a new video of Hudson walking (he's even better now and this was only a few days ago). If you watch long enough (about a minute in) you'll also see him having a conversation with Achilles. He gets so excited when the cats walk by him (as you'll see).

A year in pictorial review

2008-11-19T17:02:00.000-08:00

Here are Hudson's pictures from the 13th of every month....look how he's grown! *sniff*

Hudson's black and gold birthday

2008-11-19T16:53:00.000-08:00

We celebrated Hudson's birthday with a huge Steelers-themed party at Pluma Restaurant in Irwin, PA on Nov. 8, 2008. The party was a huge success! My mom and Jack helped plan every little detail and we can't thank them enough. Here are a few pics from the party.......

Hudson's personalized jersey that my mom made

The cake table

The delicious Giant Eagle cake

The room all decked out in black and gold

The favor bags

Hudson's "year in review" pictures and scrapbook

The cake is smashed....the party is a success!

Happy Birthday Hudson (from Dad)

2008-11-15T18:47:00.000-08:00

Hudson, you are now 1 year old. Congratulations! The past 365 days have taught me more than I could have ever imagined. As some day I hope you will be in my shoes, I will share some of those lessons learned over the past year.

Be patient. This is probably the best advice I ever received. If you can accomplish this, your job will be 90% easier.
Take a million pictures and videos. Your mother has been awesome at this and I'm so grateful. When I was doing your sideshow for your birthday, it brought tears to our eyes looking at all of your 1 month birthday pictures. To this day, we can't believe you were so little when we brought you home from the hospital!
Learn to relax. One thing's for sure: your life will become a lot more hectic and chaotic once you have a child. Make an effort to schedule weekends where you and your wife don't do anything but "hang out". Catch up on those movies you've been dying to watch but never had time. If you have family around to babysit, even better!
No one has the "right" answer. You always hear that parenting doesn't come with a handbook. While it's true, many think they know the right answer to everything from sleep training to feeding your child). Feel free to research others opinions for guidance but ultimately, it comes down to your gut feel on what's right and wrong and what works and what doesn't.
Be active in everyday activities around the house. When your wife is upstairs nursing your newborn, look around the house and see what needs to mopped or cleaned. Your wife will be so exhausted the first year that it's the least you can do.
Be bold and take the "road less traveled". You'll be amazed at how much your little one will pick up the first year of his life. For that very reason, when you get that sudden burst of road rage, scale it back and think about the message it's sending to your child if you scream to the top of your lungs at another person. Same goes for arguments with your wife. Even if she's acting irrational (which never happens ;) take a deep breath, and do your best to diffuse the situation as amicably as possible.
Stay in touch with friends and family. It'll be hard to do but when you have a free minute, pick up the phone and call a friend you haven't talked to in a while. Friends and family are the most important things in life and while they will understand your situation, it sends a special message to them that in your hectic lives, you're still thought of.

NOTE: I was thinking about adding another "lesson learned" where I was going to encourage you to invite your parents over to see your son/daughter every weekend but I think that may be pushing it ;)

We love you Hudson

Love,
Dad

Happy 1st birthday Hudson!!!

2008-11-13T17:05:00.000-08:00

The birthday boy is fast asleep listening to his personalized lullabies (thanks Grams and Pap!). And I just finished crying my eyes out as I rocked him to sleep. When did he get so big?? I sat with him, looking at my little angel fast asleep, and tried with all of my might to remember every detail about his precious face before I blink and he's 2. I want to memorize every hair on his head (there aren't many!), every eyelash on each eyelid, every movement he makes as he smiles while he's asleep.

It's hard to think back one year and remember Hudson as a newborn. Sure, I have pictures and videos, but my arms can't recall what it's like to cuddle a 7 lb baby, my hands forget the motions of swaddling a little burrito, and my body forgets the struggles to begin breastfeeding. While each day still brings new adventures, the uncertainty of being a first time parent has now been replaced with a new level of confidence. Instead of questioning each decision, such as is he hungry, is he tired, why won't he sleep (well, we still ask that one!), we've found our groove. We've learned to trust our instincts, to take Hudson's cues, and to do what works for the three of us. It amazes me how naturally parenthood comes. Before Hudson arrived, I was worried that I wouldn't "get it" and just "know" how to be a mother. Now, I can't imagine myself as anything but a mother. As if my special time tonight with Hudson wasn't enough stress on my tear ducts, I also saw a message from my dear friend Jess. She told me how proud she was of me and called me a "wonderful mommy". That brought tears to my eyes. Being a mother is my greatest of all my life's accomplishments.

In an attempt to remember my monkey when he was my little peanut, I decided to make this post a "year in review".

We've survived labor and delivery, breastfeeding, sleep deprivation, and jaundice. We've celebrated 12 "birthdays", a first tooth, a first "word" (da-da), and a first step. We've been pooped on, peed on, and puked on. We've made tons of new friends, attended playgroups, enjoyed "Mother Goose on the Loose". We've introduced cereal, tried lots of fruits and vegetables, and found our favorites in Baby Mum Mums and Spaghetti with Cheese baby food. We've played, we've read books, we've swam, we've "scored!". We've bought toys and learned that only ones with wheels will work. We've met Rachel, Alex, and Leah and learned how to sign. We've welcomed Hudson into Steeler Nation. We've questioned some decisions, we've had faith in others. We've taken advice and we've learned when we need to be our own experts. We've endured vaccines, a cat bite, and bumps on the head. We've reveled in the excitement of a first Christmas spent with loved ones and ached in the moments that we couldn't share with our families. We've smiled, we've giggled, we've cried, we've grown. We've become a family.

Happy birthday Monkey Man!

Time to get induced!

2008-11-12T10:39:00.001-08:00

One year ago today I was induced! The day went like this.....

It was a Monday and I was 39 weeks pregnant. I got in the shower that morning to get ready for my weekly doctor's appointment and asked Ryan if he wanted to come with me today since I was getting so close to my due date (Ryan went to almost every doctor's appointment with me. When I started going weekly to get my urine checked and get weighed we decided that he didn't need to come). He said no and that he would go next week if I didn't deliver by my due date (11/19). So I packed up my things for the day (after my doctor's appt., I was off to a meeting at school and then to pregnancy boot camp class) and headed to Hopkins.

The doctor's appointment started like every other one. I peed, was weighed (up 50 lbs to 191!!!), and led into an exam room. I saw a group of doctors and was meeting with a doctor I had never met before. She was really nice.....until she asked me the baby's name. I told her Hudson and her reply was "wow, that's my dog's name". Uhhh, thanks.

She felt the baby and said that she thought his head was down, but just wanted to check so she brought in the basic ultrasound machine. After looking at him, she was a bit concerned since my amniotic fluid appeared low (it should be a 5 and I was a 4 - I have no idea what measurement that is!). She explained that if the fluid is low, they may need to induce. Whoa!!! She dropped a bomb on me there! She said this ultrasound machine might not be completely accurate and she sent me over to the 3-D ultrasound tech.

I went over to that tech and she saw me right away. I had the strangest feeling while there. Of course, I wanted to make sure that the baby and I were safe, but at the same time I was hoping that my fluid was low so that I could meet my little peanut! After a quick look, she determined that the fluid was low and sent me back over to my doctor.

While waiting for the doctor to see me again, I knew that I was probably going to be induced, so I called Ryan. Well, I tried to call Ryan. While I was in my appt, Ryan's dad had called me to discuss the crazy Steelers-Browns game from the day before. I accidentally pushed talk and called his Dad back. I tried to nonchalantly discuss football, but I was dying to call Ryan! I finally called him and he was headed home and would meet me there.

I went back in to meet with the doctor. I really wanted to meet the baby, but I also was afraid of induction. In my mind, the baby would come when he was ready and I didn't want to evict him if he still needed to bake for a while longer. I asked the doctor to explain my options to me and she said that I could go without the induction, but I would need to come in every two days for tests and there was also a risk of "in-utereo death". Enough said! Hand me some pitocin!

I was able to come home and gather my things. It was really nice to have that hour with Ryan before our lives would change forever. We packed up our things and I squeezed in a bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats. We took pictures, said goodbye to the cats, and headed to the hospital.

On the way, we called our parents. I was calling my mom and her phone kept going to voicemail. I teased her that she should ALWAYS have her phone on when her daughter is approaching her due date! I was able to get in touch with her soon after and she was jumping in the car and headed to Baltimore.

Ryan called his parents and I don't think his mom believed him at first. She also jumped in her car and headed down.

We got to the hospital around 12p and I was given pitocin around 3p. They were going to start me on cervadil, but I was 100% effaced at that point. Now it was time for the fun to begin....

Ryan's mom got to the hospital first, followed by my mom. They told me I was having contractions, but I didn't feel anything. My mom was watching the monitor and was like "do you feel that?" and I didn't. But that didn't last long...

The rest of the evening is pretty blurry. I'm going to guess that it was around 8p when I started to feel the contractions. Then they hit me like a brick. I felt like I couldn't breath. I was squeezing the bedrails with all of my might. Ryan was talking to our moms and I couldn't even talk with them - I was in my own world at that point. Ryan's dad arrived and I didn't even know that he was there. I was trying to breathe through each contraction, but it didn't help. I had to do all that I could to take my mind to a "happy place". I was thinking about the Steelers winning the Superbowl (I am a true Pgh girl - thinking about the Steelers during labor!), putting my Christmas tree up, and Brett Favre (I have NO idea why I was thinking about him - I mean, he seems like a great guy and all, but he's not my favorite). This is also the point when I vowed to remember this pain and never have any more kids (everyone says that you forget the pain once the baby arrives, so I figured this was an important step). I was begging for drugs. Much to my dismay, the anaesthelogists were all in the ER with c-sections, so I had to wait.

When the anaesthelogist finally arrived, I was a bit shocked to see a woman, mid-thirties, that looked like she just stepped off of Haight-Asbury. She was wearing tie-dyed. And this woman was going to insert a huge needle in my spine?!?! And just then another contraction hit and I realized that Doogie Howser or Drake Remore could give me the drugs at that point for all I cared. I'm a bit of a freak and have this weird phobia about my spine being touched, so I wasn't sure how this was going to go. In addition to that, I was told that I had to sit extremely still and I wasn't sure how that was possible once a contraction would hit. After alot of squirting blood (according to Ryan), the epidural was in and man, did I feel good!

Oh no! That didn't last long! I started to feel contractions again! They had to adjust the epidural. Now, it was time to sleep.

Ryan and I napped for a few hours while our parents just hung out. I don't remember when exactly I woke up but I'm going to guess that it was around 1am. I was okay for a while, but then I started to feel some pressure. The pressure wasn't painful, so I was okay. Then I started to feel really sick. The nurse gave me this tiny bed pan and I knew that wasn't going to cut it. I had Ryan grab a garbage can and I rested my head in there and proceeded to dry heave. Since I hadn't eaten, there was nothing to throw up but stomach bile. I had no idea how I was going to continue with labor in this state. The nurses were happy since puking is a sign that your body is preparing to push. At 4:20am, they said it was time to start pushing and I shot up out of my garbage can and said "let's do this!". I had suddenly become a new person - I was about to become a mom!!

My OB was training another OB, so I had 2 sets of hands in my crotch. In addition to the doctor's there was about 8-10 other people in there (nurses, aides, etc.). My new cheery personality came through as I asked how the party got to my room and offered to get everyone a drink (I guess the drugs were making me loopy).

The pushing went well. I didn't feel it which was great. I don't mean to brag, but the OB said I was one of the best pushers she had ever seen (if that's something to be proud of). They asked if I wanted to have a mirror to see the baby and I said sure. BIG MISTAKE. One look was all I needed to shout "Take it away!".

At 5:25am, Hudson made his appearance. He came out crying and that was the sweetest sound to my ears. They handed him directly to me and I had 3 thoughts:
1. He's definitely a boy
2. He has curly hair
3. He doesn't have any toe nails (they were so thin that it looked like they weren't there).

I tried to nurse right away, but it didn't work, so the nurses took him next to my bed to get cleaned. Our parents were DYING outside of our room, so they peaked in to meet their first grandchild. Seeing Ryan and our parents over there with Hudson made me so sad. I had just done all of the work and they were getting spend time with him while I was stuck delivering a placenta.

After I got stitched up, Ryan looked over and said:
"It looks like Vietnam in here" followed by "Hey, that looks like a roast" (referring to the placenta). That's my husband.

It's hard to believe that one year has passed since that glorious day. We can't wait to celebrate our monkey's birthday with him tomorrow!

A mélange of posts

2008-11-12T10:04:00.000-08:00

So I have SERIOUSLY been slacking on the blog front. Hudson's birthday party turned me into Colin Cowie (Oprah's party planner) and didn't leave much time for anything else. So let me get everyone caught up...

The Pumpkin Patch

Ryan and I took Hudson to a pumpkin patch on 10/18/08. Ryan insisted that we navigate this 3-mile corn maze (this is no joke - that's really the maze!):

Hudson was proud of his Daddy for finding all 12 check points:

After the maze, we went on a hayride, picked out some pumpkins, and had Hudson pose as a kernel of corn:

Hudson walks!
I'm not sure that this is really news, but Hudson has been teasing us with a few steps here and there for quite some time. I was able to get some on video:

While he can clearly walk when we wants to, the mood doesn't always strike him.

Hudson's path of destruction

I just wanted to show everyone what Hudson does while I cook dinner:

Halloween!

Our little monkey man was, well, a little monkey man for Halloween :)

Our development had this great little happy hour/get to know your neighbors event on Halloween, so Hudson was showing off his costume there. Once cute Isabelle came over to him, he was too cool for the monkey hood:

Hudson preparing for GQ:

Hudson was really strutting his stuff and workin' the vest, so I had to include these pics:

I swear, this kid gets cuter by the minute!

SCORE!

2008-10-15T13:00:00.000-07:00

In addition to walking, Hudson's other new trick is putting his arms up as if to say "Touchdown", "Field Goal", or "the extra point is good". He now does this on cue....we say "Hudson, what do we do when Heath gets in the endzone?" He throws his arms up and we shout "SCORE!". I'm sure that other people teach their kids that this means "so big", but we drool black and gold, so "SCORE!" it is!

Here are some more SCORE! pictures:

This one is really an ode to Big Ben scoring a touchdown. Do you see the way he's pointing to the sky just like Ben? Also, not related to "score!", but equally as cute are his crossed legs. He always sits like this.

Hudson "scoring" on his 11 month birthday.

Hudson is a free man!!

2008-10-15T12:57:00.000-07:00

We have escaped the ugly reign of daycare!!! Hudson's last day was 9/30. We had to make our case to the director, but long story short is that we were able to break the contract and get our security deposit back. We are currently looking for a nanny (i.e. Hudson is home with Mommy and Mommy is getting ZERO work done).

This pic is from Hudson's first day back at home. He looks pretty happy, huh?

Look out world!!

2008-10-15T12:46:00.001-07:00

Hudson is walking!

Well, let's say he's "stepping". He's taken a few steps here and there. This all started 2 weeks ago when I was at a meeting and Ryan was home on Daddy duty. Apparently, Hudson saved his tricks for Daddy and took his first steps right after I left. Since then, he attempts to walk and one of two things happens:

1. He gets so excited that his upper body moves before his lower body and he face plants. Or...

2. He knows that he can get places MUCH faster by crawling, so he drops to his butt and crawls away.

We have yet to record any actual steps, but here's a picture of him standing:

There's nothing sweeter...

2008-09-30T12:06:00.000-07:00

...than a Steeler victory. Against Baltimore. On Monday night. For 1st place in the division.
Wow - that felt good!!!

In preparation for Monday night's game, Ryan was dressing in black and gold for work. I was afraid to put Hudson in Steeler's garb, especially given the problems we've already had with his daycare (see my previous post). As I was putting his arms into a green shirt, he gave me a look that said:
"Mom - I was born to be a Steelers fan. I don't care if we live in Baltimore. I am proud to be part of Steeler Nation. I drool black and gold. If they decide to not feed me or change my diaper today because I'm wearing black and gold, well, that's just a risk I have to take."

Who am I to deny that? So here he is rockin' his Big Ben jersey:

And here he is doing his best Big Ben impression:

The beard is GONE.

2008-09-22T17:31:00.000-07:00

While I'm happy to see my husband's face again, I'm sad that it's due to Steelers loss. Let's hope the O Line wakes up before next Monday.

Any excuse to bake!

2008-09-22T17:16:00.000-07:00

I got two new recipes and decided to welcome Fall with some yummy cookies.

First, I tempted Bakerella's cake balls. I was thinking about making some for Hudson's birthday party so I wanted to give them a whirl. Instead of red velvet, I did French vanilla cake with cream cheese frosting and I dipped them in white chocolate or semi-sweet. They are okay - I don't think I like the store bought frosting. Next time, I may try them with homemade frosting.

(If you want to know the best way to make these, here's what worked for me. I baked the cake in a 9x13 pan on Thursday. I crumbled the cake and mixed it with the frosting on Friday. I put it in the fridge for a few hours then rolled the balls on Friday night. I let it freeze overnight and dipped the balls in chocolate on Saturday)

For some reason, blogger keeps rotating this picture, but you get the idea.

I had alot more success with Jaime's pumpkin pizzelles. These are much more cakey than traditional pizzelles. For example, you can fold them and they will bend, not crack. I wasn't sure I was going to like the texture. Then I rolled a few, filled them with maple frosting, and sprinkled with pumpkin pie spice. Now we have a winner!!

I used my Aunt Coll's frosting recipe and just added a few squirts of maple syrup. If you're trying to recreate this, just make a basic icing and add as much syrup as you think it needs to have a maple flavor. I probably added 3-4 tablespoons.

The perfect "side" to a great cup of coffee on a cool Fall day!

And so it grows....

2008-09-15T17:18:00.000-07:00

Here's a picture of Ryan rubbing his "lucky beard" after the Steelers victory over the Browns. Two weeks down, 14 to go....

GUILTY!

2008-09-15T17:17:00.000-07:00

Ryan was dressing Hudson after his bath and Ryan's mom and I were chatting down stairs. I heard Ryan talking to someone in a more serious tone (i.e. not baby talk). He came down stairs and told us that he gave Hudson his Blackberry to play with, but he didn't lock it (rookie mistake). Hudson was so uninterested in getting his pajamas on that he called 911. And then hung up on them. Needless to say, they called Ryan back to see what the emergency was. Here's a picture of Hudson after the call, still holding the Blackberry and looking quite guilty - we caught him redhanded!

Gazpacho and grilled cheese - YUM!

2008-09-15T06:24:00.001-07:00

GAZPACHO (from simplyrecipes.com):

6 ripe tomatoes, peeled and chopped (I use 5 - that's all that fits in my food processor!)
1 purple onion, finely chopped (I use half of one onion)
1 cucumber, peeled, seeded, chopped
1 sweet red bell pepper (or green) seeded and chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
1-2 Tbsp chopped fresh parsley
2 Tbsp chopped fresh chives
1 clove garlic, minced
1/4 cup red wine vinegar
1/4 cup olive oil
2 Tbsp freshly squeezed lemon juice
2 teaspoons sugar
Salt and fresh ground pepper to taste
6 or more drops of Tabasco sauce to taste
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce (omit for vegetarian option)
4 cups tomato juice

Method

Combine all ingredients (I put the tomatoes through the garlic in the food processor and then mix in the liquid ingredients in a large bowl). Blend slightly, to desired consistency. Place in non-metal, non-reactive storage container, cover tightly and refrigerate overnight, allowing flavors to blend.

Serves 8.

OLIVE-PESTO GRILLED CHEESE
8 slices ciabatta, halved lengthwise
2T olive oil8t Basil-Almond Peso (see below)
8 slices fresh mozzarella
1/3c pimento-stuffed green olives chopped
BASIL ALMOND PESTO (this makes enough for two batches of grilled cheese, so I freeze the leftover pesto for the next time I want to make this)
1c fresh basil leaves
1/2c fresh parsley leaves1/4c olive oil
2T sliced almonds toasted
2 garlic cloves
1/4t red pepper flakes
minced zest and juice from one lemon
salt to taste
Puree all ingredients in food processor until smooth (Keeps for one week chilled, one month when frozen)

Preheat grill to med-high (I use the Foreman Grill for this). Brush uncut slides of ciabatta slices with oil.Spread 1t of pesto on the cut sides of each bread slice then top with mozzarella and olives. arrange second slice of bread on top. Grill sandwiches weighted down with a baking sheet and bricks (or the lid to the Foreman Grill!) until toasted on one side, 2 minutes. Flip sandwiches over, weight down, and grill until golden and cheese melts, 2 more minutes.

A word from your sponsors...

2008-09-12T07:02:00.001-07:00

The family that bleeds (and drools) black and gold...

HERE WE GO STEELERS!!!

Hudson's 1st trip to "Pittsburgh's Disneyworld"!

2008-09-12T06:43:00.001-07:00

In March of '07, we went to Disney World with our friends Roger and Kristen. It was my first time there. Kristen is originally from Pgh, so I told her that I thought Kennywood was much better than Disney World. It remained an ongoing joke between us so when Ryan's birthday rolled around, they bought him Kennywood tickets (awesome gift, by the way). We were all excited to get our "Kennywood outfits" on and head to the park with them, but our schedules never worked out. So Ryan and I made an impromptu trip to Pgh last weekend so that we could use the tickets before the park closed for the season. We went with Hudson and my brother Joey. We had a great time! Hudson is already excited for next year when he can actually ride something other than his stroller. I think he was eyeing up those Potato Patch fries too!

Mommy and Hudson at the entrance

George Michael getting some fries.

Hudson, Mommy, and Cowboy Joe

Until next year....

The story with the beard...

2008-09-12T06:31:00.000-07:00

A bunch of you have been asking me what's up with Ryan's beard. In the 11 years that we've been together, I have never seen him with facial hair. While we were in Ocean City, he just got lazy about being on vacation and didn't shave. That resulted in this:

You can't really tell from this picture, but this is when he started to look like George Michael, i.e. Hudson's "Father Figure". He's been complaining for a little while that he's had the same haircut for like 10 years, but doesn't not what else to do with it. Once he started to grow the facial hair, a light bulb went off and he decided that this was the way to change his look. I wasn't worried about it lasting for too long since I know that it gets itchy when it grows in. Around this time, the beard turned into this:

The next day, he decided that he couldn't take the itch and went to shave it off. Just as he lifted his razor, it dawned on him that the Steelers have been winning (their last preseason game and first regular season game) since he had the beard. Similar to the playoff beard in hockey, he decided that he couldn't shave it now. It just wouldn't be fair to us as Steeler fans, the men in the black and gold, and the entire city of Pittsburgh if he were to contribute to a loss just because he shaved. So the beard continues to grow. My hope is that he'll end up looking like a contestant on Survivor by the time February comes.

I'll try to post weekly updates following each Steeler victory. Here we go....

Daycare woes

2008-09-04T19:12:00.000-07:00

If you're reading this blog, you probably have already heard me complain, complain, and complain some more about Hudson's daycare. I've decided to post my complaints here. I figured that maybe if I unload them, I can stop ranting about them. Okay, be prepared....

1. On day one, I was greeted with an "Oh Lordy!" when I came to pick Hudson up.

2. Following that wonderful greeting, I walked into the classroom to find Hudson on the floor crying while another teacher just sat in the rocking chair doing nothing.

3. Also on day one, I was told that he was needy and a bully.

4. Lastly on day one, I was told that he did "1,2 buckle my shoe" as his activity - he was there for 5 hours.

5. During the first week, I called and said "Hi, this is Jenn. I'm just calling to see how Hudson is doing". I got a one word response - "okay".

6. I would ask how Hudson was doing when I would pick him up and they would just say "he'll adjust" - not answering my question.

7. They gave him food that they weren't authorized to - I signed a paper saying to only give him what I provide.

8. That food was pudding...prior to us ever introducing dairy to him.

9. They didn't see anything wrong with that.

10. I dropped him off one morning at 8:55a and the teacher put him in a stroller. I came home and watched the online video of the center and she sat there talking to other teachers, while Hudson was just strapped in the stroller, until 9:25a.

11. That same day, I saw Hudson put into an Exersaucer multiple times throughout the day. One time, he was crying while the teacher just sat on the rocking chair, doing nothing.

12. As if this day wasn't stressful enough, I went to pick him up and saw that his crib sheet was all wet from what I presumed where tears. I have specifically asked them multiple times to not let him cry himself to sleep.

13. There were days when his teacher would past me in the hallway and pretend that I was a stranger and not even say hello.

14. Following a meeting with the Director about items 1-13, Hudson was moved to a new room. Upon meeting the teachers, they kept asking why he was getting moved there and stressed that there were no other kids that were Hudson's age in their room (i.e. they were far from welcoming).

15. Also when I first met them I told them that Hudson was to only eat the food I provide. They continued to challenge me and tell me how to feed Hudson, during which they mentioned that they feed the infants Pop-Tarts.

16. Upon hearing the Pop-Tart comment, I said that we don't give Hudson sugar. The one teacher defiantly said "well, yogurt has sugar in it!" (I mentioned that I gave him yogurt).

17. The new teachers couldn't ensure that Hudson would not cry himself to sleep.

18. Whenever I drop Hudson off, I put him on the ground and he'll start to cry. The teachers drag their feet to come and sit and comfort him.

19. I walked in the other day and the local hip hop/R&B station was playing on the radio.

20. Hudson routinely comes home with food plastered to his head. To do this justice, I took a picture of the blueberries smashed into his head (it was with my cell phone, so not a great pic):

I'll stop the list at 20 to avoid overkill :) I think you get the point by now.

The marksmen of the Point

2008-09-04T18:42:00.000-07:00

Thus far, I have not delivered on my promise to provide entertainment by way of Point stories. And it has not been for lack them. It's that my blogging-binge tendencies aren't able to keep up with the randomness of everyday life in the Point. There were three recent stories, however, that deserve to be mentioned.

Before I delve into the stories, let me first set the stage for those of you who have never been to the Point. The Point (or Locust Point if you want to know it's correct title) is a historic peninsula town that serves as one of Baltimore's earliest ports. In the mid-1800s, rowhomes began to pop up to meet the needs of the ever-growing workforce that was employed by the shipping industry. In fact, the house that Ryan and I used to live in was built in 1875. Many of the "locals" in the Point live in the same houses that their families have lived in for years. The locals are refreshing to me as they remind me of my Pittsburgh roots. For the most part, they're blue collar workers that stress the importance of families, friends, and good neighbors. On any given evening, you can go outside and see them sitting on their stoops chatting the night away while they wait for the ice cream lady to drive by. Anyways, back to the history...Within the last 5 years, the Point began to flourish in the real estate boom. Many of the rowhomes that were originally purchased for a few thousand dollars were being renovated or knocked down entirely to fit the needs of the incoming yuppies flocking to the area. There is currently a clear distinct between the locals and the newbies. Lucky for Ryan and I, we had a great neighbor who was well connected with the locals and introduced us. Ryan used to enjoy his nightly chats with the little old ladies of the neighborhood. But then Ryan and I moved a few streets over into one of those new developments that I mentioned. Our new community, while in the Point, is somewhat sheltered from its glory.

1. Ryan and I were walking Hudson one afternoon. We were back in our old neighborhood. I happened to glance over at this one basement window (these are rowhomes, so the basement window is in line with the sidewalk). This is what I saw:

I wasn't sure whether I should take this as a threat or feel privileged that such a sharp shooter is living down the street.

2. Our old neighbor Melissa is in the know when it comes to Point happenings. We also go to her for the latest gossip. So, we asked her about the drug dealers that used to live next to us. (If I haven't already posted this, the greatest Point story of all came from one of the drug dealers, Mike, that sat down with us one night and told us everything about his life, including how he got his old girlfriend pregnant and his current girlfriend's dad's friend bit him on the shoulder - we even got to see the scar). She said that she wasn't sure Mike was still around and I mentioned that I saw him down the street, so maybe he was living with his mom now since that's where she lived. Well, Melissa says "I wonder if his mom is the woman who was found dead in that house". She proceed to tell us this story:

There is a rowhome broken into multiple apartments (this is where Mike's mom lived). Apparently, there was a dog there that kept barking. So, one of those damn yuppie couples called the police. When the police came, they found a woman dead inside. Following the police visit, the yuppie couple started to find pieces of cut-up baby doll on their front step. Eventually, they moved out of the Point.

Yep, someone made "threats" by mutilating a baby doll. I couldn't make this stuff up.

3. I was working in my office at home the other day. There was someone at my door. I opened it to find a young (early 20s) guy on my front step. I was prepared to tell him that I didn't want to buy a newspaper subscription so that he could go to college (yes, I'm mean.) Instead, he asked me if I wanted to buy some steaks and seafood. The confused look on my face prompted him to tell me that it was raining and he didn't feel like working so he wanted to get rid of the steaks and seafood in his delivery truck. I told him that I didn't have room in my freezer for that (which is true) and he told me that he'd throw in a free freezer. Uhhhh...what?!?! I told him no thanks and quickly locked the door.

The education of a mother

2008-09-04T18:13:00.000-07:00

I went to campus today for the first time in 2 weeks. I forgot that classes have now started. I've always loved this time of year. In addition to the obvious reasons (Steeler football, Fall weather, and pumpkin flavored food items), I relish in the excitement and anticipation of "back to school". I remember how eager I was to get back into a "school routine" once I came back to grad school. The first week brings so much zest that the rest of the year severely lacks. You would go to class, get your syllabus, and look forward to (or dread) all of the upcoming assignments. There's something about that first week or so that makes school life so appealing. Even homework is welcomed.

While I was on campus, I couldn't help but to examine all of the fresh faces (and cringe when I realized that some of these students were born in the 90s!). I peeked into a few of my classrooms (as a grad student almost all of your classes are in one of three classrooms). I saw some of my professors teaching classes that I took 5 years ago. I was reflecting on how different things were back then.

5 years ago, I was so driven to make a difference. I started school with great hope of all that I was about to learn and put to use. I thrived on the discipline of deadlines, meetings, and study sessions. I actually looked forward to Saturdays, not because it was a day off, but because it was a day that I could sit back and leisurely do school work at a coffeeshop. Now, I look at myself today and things couldn't be more different. My role as a psychologist has taken a backseat to the things that are important, namely my role as a mother and wife. Everyday, I struggle to motivate myself to move forward on my dissertation because my mind is preoccupied with what I can make the family for dinner or what new books I want to get for Hudson. The work that used to be so invigorating is now a nuisance.

So I looked at all of those first year grad students today and hoped to infuse some of their enthusiam into my hardened, apathetic view of this dissertation and doctorate process. While I used to be motivated by the prestige associated with the three letters P-H-D, I'm now overwhelmed by the importance of three different letters: M-O-M.

Hudson's first actual vacation

2008-09-04T18:09:00.000-07:00

Let me start this post by saying that I'm somwhat of a binge blogger. I never seem to have the time to post when I want to, so I keep a mental list of all the things I want to write about and then I just go to town posting when I have a free minute (i.e. when Hudson goes to sleep without any fight).

So last Wednesday, we loaded up Lucy (my Aztek) and made the 2.5 hour drive to Ocean City, MD. My mom, Jack, Aunt El, Joey, Kelly, Randy, and Brandon were all ready there. Hudson fell asleep before we even travelled a mile from the house. Unfortunately, that wasn't an indication of the remainder of the trip. He woke up about an hour outside of OC and proceeded to cry the entire way there. Well, I'm not sure if you call it crying when it's just a bunch of screaming with no tears. Anyways, we were so excited to finally get there. We all went out for steaks to celebrate my birthday and we came back to the condo for some delicious Giant Eagle birthday cake (yes, my family really loves me - they routinely transport Giant Eagle cakes out of state).

The next day we attempted to go to the beach, but it was a little cloudy. That didn't stop Hudson from enjoying himself. Here he is showing off his new top teeth (you have to look closely):

That night, the Steelers were playing a preseason game, so what choice did we have but to deck ourselves out in black and gold and head to the local Steelers bar, The Salty Dog Saloon?!?

We were able to get in some good beach time on Friday. Here's Hudson playing with the new dumptruck that Grami bought him. The kid is obsessed with wheels.

Saturday, our last full day, was the hottest of them all. Therefore Hudson got to squeeze in some pool time.

We had a great trip!!

BofA portfolio feature

2008-09-02T18:39:00.000-07:00

I just know Jenn's gonna kill me for writing an entry about finance stuff. Oh well, she's out to dinner with the "Girls" so I'm free to write whatever I want :)

Did you ever wish you could aggregate real time data from various financial accounts onto one summary page? If you're a nerd like me, you do and the Bank of America website offers an excellent solution to existing customers for free. The feature is called "My Portfolio" and it allows you to link almost any type of online account to your BofA page. You can add your 401k, IRAs, equity accounts, mortgage accounts, saving, checking, other credit cards... you name it and BofA can link to it.

Once all of your online accounts are linked, you can choose to view either a summary of your overall networth (kinda scary if you have a fat mortgage left to pay off :) or a more detailed view that shows up to date information on any securities you currently own. You also have the ability to track your progress over time using their advanced charting capabilities.

Why do I find this so handy? At the beginning of every month, I create an Excel report that details our household networth (sans mortgage). I then compare the current months data with last months data and ensure that we are either flat or (idealy) moving upwards. It's a crude finanical report card.

This process normally takes me about an hour: I gotta log into each account, ensure I pulled the right data, and create all of my reports. Now, all I have to do is log onto BofA and click on the "My Portfolio" link at the top to get the same results.

If you have an account, check it out. I'm confident you'll find that you can't live without this feature once you start using it!

Lots of updates!

2008-08-26T08:29:00.001-07:00

Wow, where do I start?!? I seriously can't keep up with this kid!

Last weekend, we took Hudson to the National Zoo in DC for the first time. It was actually a date with his future wife Layla. They're so in love....

He had his first taste of yogurt and was a BIG fan!

His 4th tooth came in. He now has two on the top and two on the bottom. Could this toothy grin be any cuter?!?

He has learned how to stand on his own. He can stand without holding on for about 10 seconds before giving up and crashing down on his bum. We don't have a picture of the "assisted stand" yet, but don't fret - I'm sure we'll get it soon enough. I figured I'd just post a picture of him standing so that I could show off how adorable he looks in these crocs!

Hudson has also learned a new consonant sound - "ba". I warned him not to called Grami a "ba-ba"! So he now knows Ba, Da, Ra, Ga. We work on Ma everyday, but I guess he's saving that one for when the time is right.

As Ryan already wrote, Hudson also went to his first professional sporting event (the Yankees vs. the Orioles). I was a little bummed that it wasn't a Steelers game, but it's okay. We're just introducing him to the inferior sports so that he has a full appreciation for how wonderful Steelers games really are.

We're off to the beach tomorrow, so we should have some great pictures when we get back. Ryan bought me a great new cell phone for my birthday yesterday and he told me that I can blog from it, so maybe we can upload pics before we even get home! Happy (early) Labor Day to everyone!

First trip to the ballpark

2008-08-24T18:27:00.000-07:00

Today, the "fam" went to Camden Yards to watch the O's take on the New York Yankees. It was a gorgeous day especially for Hudson's first trip to a ball park - to a professional sport for that matter.

Events like this make being a dad the best job in the world... they really do, I'm not just saying that. I can't help but think about how proud my father was taking me to the ballpark, and now I get to feel the same way with my son. That "passing down to the next generation" crap really tears me up.

Here are some of the highlights from today:

1) We showed up at the ballpark and I first ran to get a "beer and hotdog" at the concession stand while Jenn held Hudson and about 13 bags that we seem to need to carry everywhere we go now that Hudson has arrived.
2) I asked Hudson if he was excited about his first ballgame. He responded by drooling then smiling at a cute 2 year old girl walking by. He's a serious flirt.
3) While Jenn was taking care of Hudson (I had to focus on the game), I gave her a bite of my hotdog (which I was reluctant to do since it was so f'n good). She spilled some ketchup on her pants. I laughed at her and asked the guy next to me if I could borrow some napkins to clean up the mess my wife made. I told him that she's kinda messy and that I wasn't aware of this flaw when I married her. We had a good laugh... but Jenn didn't. She just stared at me. I wasn't sure what that meant at the time but suffice it to say that I'm writing this entry from my couch and Jenn has just brought down a pillow and blanket. I think it's for me.
4) We sat in the stands and watched a few innings of some great baseball!
5) Hudson nursed on his mother's boob while I nursed on a beer.
6) The Yankees won and we celebrated by stopping at Hudson's favorite BBQ joint (RUB - sometimes pronounced RUBS by certain senial senior citizens who won't be mentioned here).

All in all, it was a great day and I couldn't ask for anything more. I love my wife and I love my son more than anything in the world. Days like this make it seem like we live in our own little world and things couldn't be better... except for sleeping in my own bed :)

Another one popped through!

2008-08-14T16:58:00.000-07:00

In case you're keeping track, the current score is Hudson's teeth - 3, Jenn - 0. All the moms I know seemed to "forget" to warn me about the joys of teething. I mean, I know that it's painful and all, but it goes on for TWO YEARS?!?! I didn't really sign up for that...
Anyways, Hudson's top left front tooth popped through today with the right one very close behind. My adorable gummy grin is now turning into an even cuter toothy one!

(There's no picture to post because I'm lucky that I can get my finger in his mouth to feel it - forget about getting a picture of it! Those days are long gone!)

Day 3 of new recipes

2008-08-14T16:54:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned before, I'm trying all new recipes this week. We had another success today. Although I have to say I'm not quite sure how Rachael Ray got this dish made in 30 minutes! It was a 60 minute meal for me!

Red Eye Chili Gravy Steaks with Cheddar-Chive Polenta

Where have the last nine months gone?

2008-08-13T17:13:00.000-07:00

Our little monkey changed our lives forever a mere 9 months ago. I haven't stopped glowing since the day I found out that I was pregnant. Ryan hasn't stopped beaming with pride since the morning that his little sidekick came into this world. I know that it's been said before, but parenthood is truly an amazing thing. There really is no other way to explain it than by saying you know how it feels to see your heart out side of your body. Your child becomes the reason for every breath you take. With every minute that I look at my little guy I love him more than the last. It's truly remarkable how selflessness becomes a way of life and your world revolves around this little angel - anything you can do to make him happy will be done since his happiness is the only thing that matters to you. The things I do just to see my monkey smile are countless. In a little book that my mom bought me there was a quote that said "Your baby will learn how to love because of you". If that's the case, Hudson is going to be prodigy when it comes to love.

Taken right before leaving for the hospital

As if what I have already written isn't sappy enough, I also have to mention the changes that the last 9 months have had on our marriage. Parenthood can do two things to a marriage - strengthen it or destroy it. Thankfully for us, it has done the former. The highs and lows of parenting are so much more enjoyable when you have someone wonderful with whom to share them. I can feel my chest expand as my heart grows when Ryan walks into the room after a long day at work. As much as I play with Hudson, his smiles are the biggest when his Daddy walks into the room. Everyday I stop whatever I'm doing just to see his face light up when Ryan announces that it's time for the "Daddy changing dance" (while that sounds wildly inappropriate, it's a rather cute little dance that Ryan does for Hudson before changing out of his work clothes - Hudson LOVES it). I have never felt more blessed than those times I see my guys together.

Leaving the house as two, coming home as one...

Okay, I guess the sleep deprivation is getting to me - I'm not sure what caused me to be a blubbering mess right now. At least I know that my mom and Ryan's mom are at home crying along with me as they read this.

Just a reminder of how much has changed in 9 months...

New recipes...

2008-08-13T16:53:00.000-07:00

This is a week of new recipes. So far, the two I've tried have been keepers!!

Italian beef sandwiches - this is super easy!
2.5 lb round roast
1 can beef broth
1 packet of McCormick's Au Jus mix
1 packet of Zesty Italian dressing mix.

Combine the mixes and the broth in a bowl. Place roast in crockpot. Pour mixture over top of roast and cook on low for 10 hours. (I shredded the beef after 8 hours so that it could soak up some of the gravy after it was shredded.). Serve on a potato bun with a slice of provolone cheese.

Tonight I made Rachael Ray's Lime Rickey Chicky. It's a 30 minute meal. I thought it was pretty good and Ryan LOVED it. Here's a link to the recipe:
Lime Rickey Chicky with Buttered Almond Rice

Hudson's 1st day of school!

2008-08-04T18:34:00.000-07:00

It's been almost 9 months that me and my little monkey man have been playing the days away. Unfortunately, I have a dissertation that doesn't want to write itself, so that means I have to get back to the grindstone. Since Hudson isn't the best co-author (he's not too interested in disproportionate minority confinement of juveniles in Baltimore County), it was time to start daycare. I have stressed and agonized over this decision for months. Do we use a daycare or nanny/babysitter (what's the difference, by the way?)? When should we start to send him? How will we pay for this? The list of anxieties goes on and on.

Hudson and Daddy before school

I'll spare you the nitty gritty details on how we came to this decision, but we chose a daycare center right down the street from our house (who better to care for our kid than someone in The Point?!?). August 4th was his start date. I was excited for him because I thought he might enjoy playing with the other children, especially now that he's mobile. But I was extremely concerned for a few reasons. 1. He won't drink milk from a bottle. 2. He only falls asleep when I nurse him or when someone walks him around. and 3. I didn't want him to think I abandoned him.

Hudson and Mommy before school

Ryan and I both took him to the daycare at 8:30a. We talked with his teachers until 9a. Hudson was smiling, looking around, and even reached for his teacher. That made leaving much easier (and the fact that I was only leaving him for a few hours). I went to school and felt invigorated to get back into the swing of things. I called to check on Hudson at 11:30a and they said he was sleeping.

I went to pick him up at 1p. I sped there because I couldn't wait to see him! As I was putting shoe covers on my shoes before going into his room, I could hear him crying. Not sobbing, but just crying which was okay. I was walking into his room when one of his teachers was walking out. The first thing out of her mouth was "Oh Lordy" - not exactly the greeting I was hoping for. She proceeded to tell me that it's obvious that he's used to one-on-one attention and would cry when she walked away (the other teacher in the room was just sitting on a chair while he was on the ground crying). I sat down and he crawled to me crying, but started to smile once he got to me. Then he seemed fine. The teacher also asked me how he played with other kids at playgroup since he kept taking the other children's toys. So, in the first 2 minutes of arriving, she has told me that my son is needy and a bully. I was less than thrilled with her feedback.

Thankfully, Hudson seemed to be fine which makes taking him tomorrow bearable.

Hudson smiling in his new classroom

Boobs to Breezewood!

2008-08-04T18:07:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, we packed up the car once again (Hudson didn't contribute to the packing once again...), but this weekend we were off to Pittsburgh. My little brother Joey stayed with us during the week after our NJ trip, so he was also driving back with us. After a hectic morning of trying to get everything packed in addition to preparing our rental property for the new tenants, we finally headed out at 2p. For the last few weeks, I've had some problems with my car's AC. The fan would just stop blowing, but then randomly come back on. (This was particularly concerning since I spent a small fortune last summer to get a new AC). I wasn't too worried when it went out on Friday morning, thinking it will DEFINITELY come back on before we head out. Boy, was I wrong! Did I mention that it was 90 degrees?

This was one of the worst drives to Pittsburgh that I've ever been on. And I've been on quite a few since moving to Baltimore. We pretty much hit traffic from our house until Breezewood. Being the sweet wife that I am, I offered to drive so that Ryan could eat some food. Joey was in the back with Hudson. Well, I got caught up in all of the packing and organizing before we left, that I forgot to nurse Hudson before hitting the road (again, please don't call CYS...I promise I'm a better mom than these posts are making me sound). Since I was the one driving, there was no way to "road nurse", so I was stuck praying that the boobs would make it to Breezewood. In fact, everytime we hit more traffic, Ryan, Joey, and I would all sigh and say "Boobs to Breezewood!". Hudson was an absolute doll through all of this. I shed more tears than he did on this trip.
When you're sitting in traffic with no AC and the windows opened, you don't even get the luxury of a breeze. Good times....

We stopped at Starbucks in Breezewood (an iced tea-lemonade with black tea, sweetened was like a juice from the Gods at that point) so that I could nurse. Wouldn't you know that Hudson didn't even want to eat! Ahhh, the pain!

We finally made it (boobs and all) and went straight to Kings' Family Restaurant. Ryan gets the biggest kick out of Kings'. He doesn't think there's anywhere else in the world that is a big of a time warp than Kings'. Everything about the place (the people, the prices, the decor) is stuck a world that existed about 25 years earlier.

On Saturday, we went swimming at my cousin's pool. Hudson had a little piece of raw broccoli. He actually liked it. Well, except for the fact that he kept choking on it (damn! Looking like a negligent mother again!).

Thankfully, all of the heat, traffic, and boobie pain was worth it when we got to see our family! (Indulging in Kings', Giant Eagle cake, Lucci's white pizza, and Eat N Park cookies was just a bonus!!)

Grami and Hudson

Play time at the beach!

2008-08-04T17:51:00.000-07:00

This post is a little late, but life with an infant is a bit chaotic!

Over the weekend of July 25th, Ryan, Hudson, and I packed up the car (well, Hudson was slacking on the packing duties) and headed up to Ryan's parents' house in NJ where we met Bobby and Joey (my 2 brothers who drove in from Pgh), Ashley (Bobby's girlfriend), and Alex (my college roomie/BFF). We all went to the beach on Saturday along with Ryan's mom. The weather was absolutely amazing. Hudson sat on his blanket and played with his toys. He wasn't too interested in the sand and definitely was not a fan of the water.

All of that surf and sun is tiring!

We had an amazing time on Saturday night when Che (another college roomie/BFF) and Mike (her husband), and Megan (high school BFF), Jay (her husband), and Izabella (their daughter) joined us all for dinner catered by none other than the family chef, Ryan's dad. It was so great to see everyone and catch up. Unfortunately, we got so carried away with catching up that we forgot to take pictures :(

Hudson also wanted to partake in the party...

(DISCLAIMER: He didn't actually drink the beer - don't call CYS)

Hudson also had his first taste of pasta - he was a fan.

It finally happened...

2008-07-24T10:57:00.000-07:00

...one of the cats bit Hudson.

The funny thing is that I was going to post yesterday on how great the cats are with Hudson. In fact, yesterday I ran to the bathroom and came back to find Hudson on top of Kiva, pulling her tail. She was just sitting there. I praised her and gave her lots of kisses for being such a good girl. Guess she didn't get the message I was trying to send.

Let me preface today's story by saying that Kiva is obsessed with Hudson. When he's on the floor playing, she is constantly coming over to him, sitting up against him. I always shoo her away, but she ends up right back where she started.

So, today I was playing with Hudson in the living room/dining room area. Kiva was not around. I walked into the kitchen to put my dish into the dishwasher. As I opened the dishwasher I heard Hudson SCREAM. I ran in the dining room and found him sitting up screaming. So I figured that he didn't fall and hit his head or anything. I was a bit confused. I picked him up to examine him and found 4 bite marks on his arm. I felt awful! Only one broke the skin, but since cat bites are notorious for causing infection, we're off to the doctor....